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Abandonment Issues worsening Jealousy?

Wicked Miss

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absolutely, i have some of these issues and i think my fear of losing someone i love def. makes me jealous esp. if they have other close female friends or are succeeding very well. It's like I want them to do well and succeed and it makes me feel great when they are happy and doing well-truly, but I do also become jealous of them for their success and then start feeling isnecure like maybe not good enough and thinking they might leave for someone better. they are related but not mutually exclusive.

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Totally, in fact, this is the biggest problem my abandonment issues have produced for me in the past.


If you are experiencing this, try to bring awareness into it. Sometimes its really hard because our logical mind is saying, "No, there is nothing to be jealous about, I trust him/her" but yet we are still angry deep inside and don't know why. First you have to admit you have abandonment issues, then you have to recognize them when they come up in your current life, then you need to work on ways to diffuse them. I am working on them with my personal counsellor right now. If you want to know some of the techniques we have worked on, feel free to PM me.

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Hells Yeah! I think when you have a constant fear that your other will leave you, it creates tension whenever someone you feel is superior comes their way! Which can really make you down play your own importance and worth.


If you have abandonment issues I can imagine it being harder to control those fears. I have a buddy who has abandonment issues and she says it makes her feel really helpless and upset when he is around another girl. This was just recently she admitted it.


Scarew had some solid advice!

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  • 2 weeks later...

I so totally agree. I have some abandonment issues that are rearing their ugly head right now. And I have very jealous feelings going on right now, which may or may not be unfounded. My very best friend is having some personal stuff going on right now that he is not ready to talk about. He told me it has nothing to do with me personally and that he might not be as available as i want him to be for awhile. Well, that just set things off right there. I am so miserable and feel like I am losing my best friend, and what doesn't help is that he works with another female and I am very jealous of that.....I hate issues....

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