Jess... Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 Are you supposed to ask about them? Just, like "hi, hows X going?"?? I know they would probably be expecting me to ask about my ex, but I've thought if/when I run into my ex's parents, I will ask about his sister, but not him. Is it a bad idea to ask about the ex? Just wondering so I don't make an idiot of myself lol Link to comment
eleanorrigby1 Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 just say "hi! how are you" dont ask about anyone else, let them mention it, they probably wont. It could be a little awkward but thats natural and dont let that upset you. i was really close to my ex's parents, really close to his mum and when we split up i was devestated that the friendship with them was also over. i bumped into them once in a restaurant and i was on a date with my current boyfriend, they came over and hugged me and i just introduced them "Paul this is bob and sue, bob and sue this is paul!" they all shook hands and my fella said "who are they?" and i said "oh they were my ex's parents" think he thought i must have been good because my ex;s parents still liked me! ha ha I still see his mum every now and again and i would always say "hi sue! how are you? any holidays this year? blah blah yeah im going.." I never mention my ex. neither does she. Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 30, 2007 Author Share Posted March 30, 2007 Oh thanks for that, thats really helpful advice It will be easy not to ask about my ex, because I know they will probably be expecting me to, which makes me even more determined not to lol Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 yeah, i think it could be a tricky thing. what to say etc. i guess the best thing is just to be polite and casual. if anything just ask them about how their life is going. I actually still have my ex's apartment keys from a couple of years ago. I’ve been considering visiting her parents so they can give it back to her, that's probably slightly better than breaking NC with her. but it'd still somehow seem strange, "hi, i just dropped around because i wanted to get her apartment keys back to her" although i know it's probably a good thing to get around to doing it sometime as she's now got another boyfriend and she could probably use a spare set of keys. it somehow feels strange, even though i still had a good relationship with the parents, and they've invites me around numerous times for a coffee after the breakup. i can't exactly mail them to her due to security risks, maybe i could write a note and simply put the keys into her parents mail box. Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 30, 2007 Author Share Posted March 30, 2007 Do you really need to give them back? If it's been a couple of years, wouldn't she have gotten others cut don't you think? I'm not trying to be a downer, or anything, not trying to sound mean, so sorry if I did. But yea, you're right, it would be weird if you just dropped around to her parents place one day...maybe you should just hold onto them. Put them away or something. If she wants them, she could've asked you for them years ago Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 yeah, i guess, it just feels strange to have the option that i could simply walk into her appartment whenever i want. Hey, maybe i could walk in on them in the middle of the night while her new boyfriend is visiting, or maybe i can wait till the next owner starts renting the place, then i can sneak in and steal everything (sarcastic tone of voice). nah, i think the keys in the parents mail box is the way to go. but yes, meeting with ex's and meeting with ex's parents can sometimes be a bit strange. I think the best thing is to just forget that they are your ex's parents and talk to them like you'd talk to anyone else. it'll only be strange if you make it strange. Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 30, 2007 Author Share Posted March 30, 2007 yeah, i guess, it just feels strange to have the option that i could simply walk into her appartment whenever i want. Hey, maybe i could walk in on them in the middle of the night while her new boyfriend is visiting, or maybe i can wait till the next owner starts renting the place, then i can sneak in and steal everything (sarcastic tone of voice). nah, i think the keys in the parents mail box is the way to go. but yes, meeting with ex's and meeting with ex's parents can sometimes be a bit strange. I think the best thing is to just forget that they are your ex's parents and talk to them like you'd talk to anyone else. it'll only be strange if you make it strange. I think I'd like that feeling! lol I don't think I'd ever act on it, but just the thought of "i could get in" would be cool lol jk You're right. I probably should just treat them like any other person. After all I guess that's what they are now... Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 "I should have changed my stupid lock I should have made you leave your key If I had known for just one second you'd be back to bother me" Gloria Gaynor / Cake Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 30, 2007 Author Share Posted March 30, 2007 Ahh but you're not going to bother her lol....are you??? lol jk. I would seriously just put the keys in a box somewhere, and forget about them. She would probably think it strange that you're returning them after all this time, adn after all, they are only keys, it is easy to have others cut if need be Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 Actually in this country it's illegal to cut keys. Hence you can’t have them cut anywhere. And ultimately she’ll have to get in contact with me to get the keys back if she ever wants to move out of the apartment. Yes, it is funny thinking of what I could use the keys for. It’s a pity I’m not more of a dishonest man or a stalker or something, I can think of many fun things to do with those keys. But nowadays I couldn’t really care less, as I’ve moved on and have a much much better girlfriend now. Somehow your perspective for all this changes when you get a new SO. maybe that's who you should talk about when meeting the ex's parents. Jk So Jess, how often do you end out seeing your ex's parents? do they live in the same city? do you think you'll be seeing them sometime soon? some people ignore ex's and ex's parents when they see in the street, i think it's polite to at least give a nod, or say hi. Link to comment
Dako Posted March 30, 2007 Share Posted March 30, 2007 Actually in this country it's illegal to cut keys. Hence you can’t have them cut anywhere. . Really? So if you lose your keys what do you do? I've never heard of this. The way I misplace things, that would be a disaster. Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 31, 2007 Author Share Posted March 31, 2007 maybe that's who you should talk about when meeting the ex's parents. Jk So Jess, how often do you end out seeing your ex's parents? do they live in the same city? do you think you'll be seeing them sometime soon? some people ignore ex's and ex's parents when they see in the street, i think it's polite to at least give a nod, or say hi. lol. If I had a new SO. haha. I have seen them a few times, yes they live in my city, and so does my ex unfortunately... I said hello and smiled at his mum one day, she said hello back, but it looked like it killed her...It's hard to say exactly when I would be seeing them, but its things like, running into them in the supermarket, (which is bound to happen) or seeing them in the street. Where I live is a small town, so it'll be easy to run into them...which isn't a good thing lol. I think it's polite to at least give a nod or say hi too, it makes you look bad if you completely ignore them, and then they can go home, or around town and say "so and so just ignored me down the street, how rude..." blah blah blah. It's easier to just acknowledge them Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 Really? So if you lose your keys what do you do? I've never heard of this. The way I misplace things, that would be a disaster. Actually if you’re renting then you need to go to the housing owner and pay to have them change the locks etc. although if you just forget the keys inside you can get them to come and open the door with one of their keys for a fee. If you own a place/business you need to go to a certain place with proof of ownership to get keys made. i guess it’s all good for security, but it is a pain if you lose your keys (luckily that hasn’t happened to me yet). lol. If I had a new SO. haha. I have seen them a few times, yes they live in my city, and so does my ex unfortunately... I said hello and smiled at his mum one day, she said hello back, but it looked like it killed her...It's hard to say exactly when I would be seeing them, but its things like, running into them in the supermarket, (which is bound to happen) or seeing them in the street. Where I live is a small town, so it'll be easy to run into them...which isn't a good thing lol. I think it's polite to at least give a nod or say hi too, it makes you look bad if you completely ignore them, and then they can go home, or around town and say "so and so just ignored me down the street, how rude..." blah blah blah. It's easier to just acknowledge them I guess it also depends on how much the ex’s parents like you. I know I used to always go to her parents place for a sauna. It became a tradition. After the breakup they keeps asking me to come around for a sauna at their place, but I didn’t because it would’ve felt strange. I also used to chat to the ex’s parents on the phone sometimes They really liked me, and were trying to get me back. They were good friends, but I had to do NC with the parents when I did NC with the ex. Hence losing a friendship. Well now my new SO has a private sauna in her own apartment, even better! Some of my friends have become friends with the ex, and have more contact than me now. They were talking about inviting her on our ritual spring hiking trip (as done every year) it’d be a bit strange now that I have a new SO, and my ex has a new SO. but It’d be rude to ask my friend to un-invite her. jess, you seem to have the right idea of how to handle your ex's parents. being a small town it'll naturally increase the occurrence, but shouldn’t be a problem if you're civilized. Link to comment
Jess... Posted March 31, 2007 Author Share Posted March 31, 2007 I guess it also depends on how much the ex’s parents like you.. They LOVED me when I was with my ex...Not too fond of me now though lol jess, you seem to have the right idea of how to handle your ex's parents. being a small town it'll naturally increase the occurrence, but shouldn’t be a problem if you're civilized. Thanks, I feel better about it now...Not so worried that I'll say the wrong thing lol Link to comment
HyruleGuardian Posted April 1, 2007 Share Posted April 1, 2007 Just be polite. Ask how they're doing and don't ask about the ex at all. Don't be immature and try to hide from them or anything. Link to comment
Jess... Posted April 1, 2007 Author Share Posted April 1, 2007 Just be polite. Ask how they're doing and don't ask about the ex at all. Don't be immature and try to hide from them or anything. I never had any intention to ask about my ex, as I know they would be expecting me to (I am a very determined person, if I think someone is expecting someting of me, I will do the oppostie to prove them wrong lol) just wanted to know if I should ask about his sister instead of him. I have never tried to hide form the ex's parents, only from the ex haha Link to comment
Karhu Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 ex's parents/freiends are great if you want to show off your new fantastic SO. You know the information will get back to them. Mwahahaha Link to comment
Jess... Posted April 3, 2007 Author Share Posted April 3, 2007 ex's parents/freiends are great if you want to show off your new fantastic SO. You know the information will get back to them. Mwahahaha Haha very true Link to comment
Brooke657 Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 I am such good friends with my boyfriends mom. I don't really have a relationship with my mom or step-dad so she's like the mom in my life. If we ever broke up I would definatly still be close to her. Link to comment
boosted4life84 Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 Ah, the ex's parents.... I work with them. Her Dad is President and CEO of a company and her Mom is the Controller. I see them both every day and I say hi and they return. We have normal, every day conversations and the ex is never brought up. Her mom has said a few things about her school and whatnot, but that is it. I still get along great with her parents, and I do not see any sign of that fading. Yes, it is tough. They are a constant reminder for me. It is making it that much harder to get over her, but I still feel that I am making a lot of progress. As long as you are polite and keep a smile on your face, what can go wrong? Link to comment
Jess... Posted April 4, 2007 Author Share Posted April 4, 2007 As long as you are polite and keep a smile on your face, what can go wrong? Very true Link to comment
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