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Aaawww, Pumpkin!

 

How are you doing, Sweetie? Is this typical of him to just stop the communication?

 

Are you sure we're not dating the same guy? I read back on some of your posts and wow he sounds so much like my "boyfriend." I am so here for you!

 

As far as contacting him.... If you do, I would call him one time. Leave a message like "I'm a little concerned about you, please call me back" or even more simply with "Please give me a call."

 

And then all you can do is wait. Yes, he owes you an explanation but at this point, I wouldn't even expect an explanation out of him.

 

Is he super conflict avoidant?

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Before when we went out he might have done this to me but I was the one who always called. He basically was super good until a week ago and then boom not wanting to talk and what not. He even told me that he doesn't deal with things just goes along like things never happened. So I should call and say I'm slightly concerned that I haven't heard from you in the past two days?

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This is a risk you took in your situation getting back together with him. Sure, you can call him and ask for an explanation - certainly you deserve one - but make sure you take care of you and don't do that if you can't handle him potentially not responding.

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I think that if you call him, you should not leave a message that is too wordy.

 

Keep it simple. If you talk to him, tell him you don't understand the silence, let him explain if he offers but don't demand an explanation, and then tell him that this silence or "ignoring" you is unacceptable.

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Don't beat yourself up, hun.... Sometimes we just have to give it that extra chance to work.

 

But - Do work on yourself and getting out of this unhealthy relationship. I've learned that people like this "never" change. They just don't seem to have what it takes to have a healthy relationship.

 

I am terribly sorry for what you are going through! My bf has done this to me a number of times. I keep going back - back to the unhealthy relationship - the relationship that has me jaded about all relationships.. Because I find it difficult to let go.

 

See my signature line.

 

Another good one - something like: Why keep knocking and crying at that door of unhappiness? I promise if you try one of the other million doors of opportunity, you will find much more happiness! (I know easier said than done!)

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Aw, Pumpkin! Stay strong! What are your plans for the day? Are you working right now?

 

I am so here for you! And I know how gutwrenching it is.

 

One thing I continuously think about is: It is such liberation to be away from the lack of consistancy from them. It is liberating and it feels good. Once you can get over this part....

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"Because he hasn't talked to anyone."

 

What does that make you think? That he might be down and out and withdrawing from everyone and that you shouldn't take it personally.

 

But you should! You deserve respect and consideration.

 

To answer your question - are you broke up or not?

 

Probably completely up to you. If you choose to accept this behavior and disrespect, he may very well come back thinking everything is okay when he decides to. (Who knows when?)

 

I strongly suggest that if you decide to continue on with this relationship, you set serious boundaries and tell him this is not acceptable.

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Hey Darkpumpkin,

 

Sheesh that stinks. His answer was SO childish. He apparently does not care about your concerns and putting them to rest. If it were me, I would move on. Life is too short to be playing games like that. There are plenty of men out there whom will treat you better than this.

 

His loss. Honestly, this guy does not deserve you. Period. Come here for support. We will help in anyway we can. Hang in there.

 

(((hugs)))

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