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30 days NC today...an inspirational story


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Well, I will not go into the details of the break as that is not the focus of this post. Today marks 30 days of NC and I know this really isn't typical but they flew by! Anyway, she left because she was no longer getting the butterflies, spending time together was becoming a chore, and she just saw me more as a friend. Well, as most of you would agree, after 10 months the butterflies go away and you do become more "friends." Bottom line though is we broke up. What am I most proud of though is when she left, just before I walked out the door I said well, I will miss and always love you. That was it. Thirty days ago and not a word. Tempted? Absolutely, but I worked through it.


So what happened in the interim? I got a hot shot teaching job and was hired by my alma mater to conduct interviews this summer. Interestingly enough, I wonder if I would have pursued these oppurtunities had she been in my life. I am ready to be friends now. I miss her the most in the capacity of a friend for honestly the "romantic" feelings were the first to fade. I do care about her, always will. I am having some internal conflict though between pride and just biting the bullet. I would like her to call me for the simple reason she requested time and space. But it has been a month and knowing her as I do, I highly doubt she is going to make the first move. At this point I feel as I have proved to her but more importantly myself that I don't need her. We've both made our points and now its time to start anew as friends. Any thoughts?

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It feels fine. Yes, I of course have brief moments from sadness from time to time but that is natural, you cannot erase memories. I have thought through what I could do differently next time and taken it as a life experience that has made me stronger. Did I have some great epiphany? Not really. And yes, I do legitimately want to be friends, as strange as that may seem.

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If you feel you have healed enough and the feelings won't come back, then I don't see a problem with calling her asking for a friendship.


I'm in a similar situation myself actually. My ex broke it off with me and she came back after about 3 weeks wanting a relationship again. I told her that I wasn't ready to do it again. So she was really upset, and eventually we just stopped talking. Now I want to call her and see if we can be friends again. I miss her company as a friend, because we were friends longer than we were in a relationship. Hopefully in time it'll happen.

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