What questions to ask on a date?

[emit_remmus]

I really like this girl, and I need help coming up with a list of interesting questions to ask her on the date.

[Batya33]

That could be the kiss of death - you will be so focused on your list that you will forget to go with the flow. I would simply have a few topics in mind - travel, current events, music, books, etc. If she can sense that you "rehearsed" what to ask that could be a turn off. If you two generally click, the conversation should flow and whether you talk about tastes in breakfast cereal or the meaning of life, it really doesn't matter.

[Ferion]

Yeah what bataya33 said. We can't really tell you what to talk about. But we can tell you what to not talk about. Avoid more sensitive topics...abortion, politics those kinds of things - sex included. You don't want to be seen as a hornball now.

 

Just picture her as one of your casual friends you usually spend time with.

[terk2021]

Ask her what she likes to do, what her interests are, what her family is like, where she is from... Things like that. Ask a lot of open ended questions, not yes no questions

 

Terk

[CharlesF]

I like to keep the conversation light. You can ask about her job, her friends, her interests. Sometimes it is good to ask about places she has traveled or might like to travel.

 

If you want to get more serious, you can ask what she is looking for in a relationship or subtly bring sex into the conversation.

[Batya33]

I cannot stand being asked "what I like to do for fun." Usually I try the honest approach rather than the grasping for what "exciting" things I do for fun. I will give a laundry list including the routine and the not so routine. I much prefer the other person sharing a specific activity he enjoys and asking if I ever tried it, or simply letting our interests reveal themselves through conversation.

[Day_Walker]

If you want to go off of a set number of questions then you have to state that and just dont do it fly by wire. It all depends on the kind of questions that you ask her, because the kind of girl she is will determine what kind of questions you should ask. For example I wouldnt ask intellectual questions to a girl who wasnt intellectual. I dont know your dating history with this person but at first you should just work on getting to know her. Think of some questions that would allow you to do that.

 

As far as being scripted, it can be done. I do it all the time, I have 12 questions that I ask every girl that I go out with because their answers to the questions give me an accurate representation of the person she is. Regardless of her thinking the questions are scripted she will go out with you again if she likes you she wont be basing her decision on the scripted questions.

[sophie274]

I don't know ... I can't say this has happened to me, but I think if I felt as though a guy were running me through his test I would be less than pleased. I'm pretty sure it would really weird me out.

 

Just go with the flow. Once you start the conversation - by asking what she does, where she's from, or something similar - I think the conversation will (hopefully) take on a life of its own. I would stick to light topics of conversation - interests, jobs, travel, whatever you might have in common - and keep the hard-hitting questions for later. I think they can make things very uncomfortable (what are you looking for in a relationship, etc ...) and so might be counterproductive. Sure, you are looking for compatibility, but you don't want to scare all your potential girlfriends off!

 

I was once on a date with my boyfriend and the couple next to us in the restaurant were clearly on an early date. The woman was asking questions like "what is you greatest accomplishment so far" "what is the craziest thing you've ever done". In my opinion: YUCK.

[Day_Walker]

I don't know ... I can't say this has happened to me, but I think if I felt as though a guy were running me through his test I would be less than pleased. I'm pretty sure it would really weird me out.

 

It may weird you out but that is not the issue here. It may be strange to you but would that inhibit you from going out again. I can say that the questions that I ask have never done so. Because as long as the questions are interesting to her and engaging then she will go along with it. As I said earlier if she likes you then she will go out with you again, which means that she can dislike whatever but she is still going out with you, so what she likes isnt exactly important to getting another date.

[Dating Coach]

You don't want to make it sound like an interview. Ask her in depth questions about thhe hobbies she says she has and then tease her in a flirting way regarding them. Make it fun. If you have a list and you run down the list during the date you will kill the mood. This is no job interview.

[Aurian]

I agree - don't cling to a script or ask questions that sound like a job interSome I had used on me:

view ("what was your greatest accomplishment???").

 

Try make something slightly quirky and different.

- What is your dream house?

- If you had infinite money, what would you do?

- If you had children what would you name them?

- Fame, power or money?

[cpc28655]

This is very hard to answer, you just need to go with the flow. If you script yourself, she will spot it a mile away. However, you should consider a few things NOT to ask/tell her. Stay away from anything sexual (for now).

 

Another thing to remember is listening. If she is telling you about a problem (at work, or wherever) just listen and sympathize. Don't try to fix her problems! She will take offense to that.

[cpc28655]

I cannot stand being asked "what I like to do for fun." Usually I try the honest approach rather than the grasping for what "exciting" things I do for fun. I will give a laundry list including the routine and the not so routine. I much prefer the other person sharing a specific activity he enjoys and asking if I ever tried it, or simply letting our interests reveal themselves through conversation.

 

I usually answer that question with, "I like to make a to-do list of things that I have already done."

[Alexis_failure]

when I was getting to know my current bf, I asked him some pretty bog standard questions about himself. I asked him about his hobbies and interest, what his fave book was, why is it his faveorite?

One day I ran out of questions to ask him, so I said "tell me alittle bit about youreslf" I thought this was a good idea as it allowed him to talk about anythng he wanted.

"What do you want to know?" I don't know thats why I asked. So off the top of my head I asked him if he'd ever been in a boat with a leak? he laughed at this and started talking about canoes and stuff.

Ask a slightly quirky question and the convrsation will probably flow on from there.

[ghost69]

whatever you ask, don't dig too much. prying questions lead to cancellations.

[emit_remmus]

I think dating is lame.

[Sweet Buttabean Jellayroll]

awww man....just talk to her......no questions....shes human.....gosh ya'll dont gotta ask certain question just know where boundasries u dont cross and just talk....about i dont kno...be yourself things will hapen naturally

[cpc28655]

I think dating is lame.

 

depends on who you are dating.