Beauty in the eye of Darwin

[Clementine orange]

I think that societies state of shallow has reached new depths. I just read that there is a on-line dating services reserved for "hot" people only. You have to send some pictures in and if you are an "8" or up then you are in - below that and you are rejected.

According the the article I read, only 8% of those who apply get in.

 

If you google "hotenough" then you will find masses of articles about this webpage

 

and here is the actual website.

 

link removed

 

I'm not really sure what to make of all this. I despair for the future of our civilization. I guess I shouldn't be shocked or surprised but I am a little. It happens in real life so why shouldn't it happen on line. It just seems to blatent and mean.

 

 

Let us all now collectively gnash our teeth.

[Jayar]

Hmmm... I'm gonna send my pic in!

[Jetta]

When I was 20's I'd make it. These days I don't look so good. Not gonna fight it, it's life.

[BellaDonna]

I'm not really sure what to make of all this. I despair for the future of our civilization.

 

I would not worry about it too much. Just view the site as a place that weeds out and contains very shallow and/or troubled people. Luckily they do not make up a significant part of civilization.

 

Maybe I'm bitter because:

1.) I don't have the confidence to send my picture in

2.) I don't think I would rate high enough to be allowed in the club

3.) I don't want to be told that I don't rate high enough

 

You have to ask yourself: Do I care? Is that a group I would want entry into anyways?

 

The site might be full of "beautiful people" but the content is essentially ugly. Anyone who would come right out and display themselves on the site like a piece of meat- and subject themselves to a "rating" from others on a site like that probably has a lot of problems on the inside. It cries out: low self essteem/seeking validation.

 

There's nothing wrong with being attractive/hot or having "standards" of attraction for potential romantic partners- but that site has to be the cheesiest thing I've seen in a LONG time!

 

BellaDonna

[applepie]

Agreed Belladonna!

[shes2smart]

Yeah. Saw a story about that on CNN a couple days ago.

 

If that's what people who want to join that site value, who am I to tell them they can't value that?

 

When I was younger, single and dating, I use to complain and rant about guys being shallow and not getting to know me and rejecting me just based on my appearance. It was like bashing my head against a brick wall.

 

Then, I figured out a couple of things:

 

>They have every right to have whatever standards they choose for themselves. If that means they only like tall, thin, blonde women, that's fine -- it's their choice to make, and they have a right to like whatever it is they like.

 

>It was ok that not everyone I dated/met was attracted to me. In fact, it was ok that most of them weren't. It really weeded out guys who weren't on the same wavelength/after the same thing as I was.

 

>I didn't need to take it personallly if they weren't attracted to me. They had their ideas long before I entered the picture, it really wasn't a big deal if I didn't fit their idea of what a girlfriend should look or act like. Being true to who I was - flaws 'n all - was more important than meeting someone else's standards for who I should be.

 

 

This dating site is really unimportant in the larger scheme of things. It's my guess that there are far more people who don't want to join their "exclusive" club than those who do. If there's one thing marketing people have learned, it's that if you hold up something as "exclusive" and "limited," there are some people who will want it just because of that -- not because it's anything they really need or would be interested in without that false shine on it.

 

I wouldn't look at the existence of that site as an indication society's going to hell in a handbasket. I'd look at it more as "here's a couple of guys who figured out how to get some folks to part with their hard-earned dollars by generating a created need."

[darkpumpkin]

I'm sorry but that's insane. I just clicked the link and I laughed when I read "Online dating sites are a great way to meet that future soul mate - much better than trying to make a connection at a bar or club." You want to make a soul mate match but only if your beautiful enough to. ahhh well I guess that's life. I find the internet is as much as populairity contest as high school. How many friends/favorite/matches do you have? really cause I have so many more. I would put your pic up there! why the hell not. If your declined is it really a loss?

[Dako]

Not surprising.

 

There are also dating groups for Mensa-types.

In my town, there's a site to connect the "hottest women with men of substantial wealth" thus reinforcing some ugly stereotypes.

[CluelessGuy321]

What can I say?

 

I have a pizza face with cavier tastes.

[shes2smart]

Not surprising.

 

There are also dating groups for Mensa-types.

In my town, there's a site to connect the "hottest women with men of substantial wealth" thus reinforcing some ugly stereotypes.

 

True...it's not surprising.

 

Dating, by its very nature, is an exclusionary process.

 

All of us exclude based on whatever our personal preferences may be...for some its physical appearance.

 

Me...I got a bias against the humor-challenged. If he didn't like (or worse - didn't KNOW) Monty Python, it killed my attraction.

[Leonhart]

Does the internet get yet again one more strike against it? Me thinks it does.

[willow2900]

On the radio the other day there was a story about a group from I want to say Switzerland, but that could be wrong, scientists, who have developed a computer program that you can enter your pic into to. It bases your features against movie stars, singers, and other famous people to give you a 1 out of 10 number.

 

But again - who would really want to do this? And why are scientists "wasting" time, in my mind, on something like this?

[Portage]

Pfffft! Another reason for young females to pick up smoking. I'm sick of hearing women say they'd rather risk cancer than increase their fat cells.

 

Crazy, Crazy world we live in.

[AzureSkyes69]

This does not surprise me in the least..there are alot of shallow people out there guys & gals..and it is getting worse.

The internet is just giving these people more access to do these sorts of things.

 

People do judge others in some shape or form,it might be looks,it might be how intelligent they are etc..

It is natural pretty much..but this is crazy this website.And it is taken to the extreme.

 

What is funny to me is I know two people that would sign themselves up..lol they think themselves to be the greatest thing since sliced bread.

now as far as looks they would be high up there on the scale..as far as other things character,personality..etc they would score on the lower side of the spectrum.truth be told.

 

 

I judge myself enough I don't need others doing it for me..

I am my own worst critic.

[Leonhart]

Pfffft! Another reason for young females to pick up smoking. I'm sick of hearing women say they'd rather risk cancer than increase their fat cells.

 

Crazy, Crazy world we live in.

 

Eww, people really say that?

 

I can understand not wanting to be heavy, but c'mon... smoking is disgusting.

[Shinobie]

Wow that probably is one of the most shallow sites ever created. I thought most human being evolved as far as our animal like insticts go but it seems like we haven't.

[cpc28655]

How is it any different than bbw, or smbd websites? They have the right to have their fetish, what ever it may be. I would suggest not going to that website.

[AwdreeHpburn]

I agree cpc - I was going to say that too.

 

Its all about what someone is into. Exclusivity is not exclusive to the internet. There's all kinds of forms of it every where, in every culture. Its not a bad thing. Its natural.

[Daddy Bear]

BBW dating sites are exactly what came to mind when I first read the OP. I don't believe that society is going to hell in a handbasket of vanity nowadays (look at how the ancient Egyptians slapped on the makeup, or how the Greek sculptors glorified a certain body type), I just think that everything is more out in the open as the information revolution picks up steam via the Internet.

[shes2smart]

How is it any different than bbw, or smbd websites? They have the right to have their fetish, what ever it may be. I would suggest not going to that website.

 

It isn't any different. The only difference is, for some reason, people tend to take the looks thing very personally...where they don't seem to care much if someone's got a preference for larger women (I have yet to see a guy with a preference for BBW's called "shallow" nor have I ever heard of someone complaining because a site was intended only for BBWs), or people of a certain income level, or people into alternative sexual expression or (my own bias) folks above a certain level of intelligence.

 

If you're not gonna get your panties in a twist over things like "BBWs ONLY" sites, then you're on shaky ground getting upset about a "Hot People ONLY" site, IMO. They're both about screening out folks that don't fit a certain set of appearance-related criteria.

 

As I said before, dating is an exclusionary process by it's very nature. It's not like getting a job, or renting a place to live -- in dating a person doesn't have to be fair and equitable to all...nor should they be. I doubt any one of us would like to have someone telling us what our personal preferences should be.

[ProtestTheHero]

Very true, shes2smart. This is the world we live in, and certain people have certain tastes. If an 8+ does not wish to date your average looker, I don't know of any ground I have to condemn them. In regards to the evolution point made earlier, choosing good looking mates is more primal than being politically correct.

 

The only reason this irritates people is because it makes many feel inferior. Well, looks wise, some of us are (I'm no looker myself).

[cpc28655]

Yeah, what she said. lol

[afrodite79]

HA! I looked through the hot folks on that site and it was just as i suspected. The guys were all tanned, dark haired with a strong jawline and muscular. The women were thin with long hair, big breasts and similar facial features. No really ethnic looking people. There really is a formula to being "hot" and it excludes a lot of people.

 

I've been told I'm hot by enough guys but I wouldn't send my picture in. I don't fit the standard "hot" look anyway and would probably get rated a 1 or 2. I think the kind of people who'd want to meet someone from that site are more about looks and image. Some might have their own standards and some might just want to have a trophy GF/BF.

 

I think regarding the BBW sites that it's different and people don't get bent out of shape about them because larger women (and men but mostly women) are basically treated like sort of an underclass by people. They're not seen as the ideal to aspire to by society and most people don't want to be fat because of that. Being fat isn't unattainable for most people but being the thin, facially beautiful, big breasted (or tall, dark, muscular for guys) ideal is. If some guy turns a woman down because she doesn't weigh 300+ lbs she isn't going to feel as bad because she probably doesn't want to weight 300 lbs. and also sees it as unattractive herself. You don't see people endagering their lives/health trying to gain weight. You do see people starving themselves and/or spending money on plastic surgery for lipo, and breast/pec implants where there could be complications.

 

People get mad/hurt when they wish (consciously or unconsciously) that they were something and are rejected because they aren't that.

[scarew]

I don't really understand how the title of this thread relates to the discussion... but anywho, I too think its disgusting. Well, I more have pity for these people than disgust.

 

Um... whats bbw and sbmd?

[shes2smart]

I don't really understand how the title of this thread relates to the discussion... but anywho, I too think its disgusting. Well, I more have pity for these people than disgust.

 

Um... whats bbw and sbmd?

 

Big, Beautiful Women

 

I'm assuming the other is a mixed-up version of BDSM - bondage, discipline sadomasochism.