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Do you date just to date?

Jetta

By Jetta
in Dating Advice

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jengh Experienced

jengh

Posted
Posted

personally, I hate casual dating. I'd rather be 100% single and not seeing anyone that being unsure of what's next or whatnot. I like the idea of being interested and persuing a relationship.

 

I suppose that limits my options a bit, but I'm afraid of being played or hurt.

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rocio Veteran

rocio

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Posted

I love to date casually / just for the sake of dating. It takes the pressure off and gives you an opportunity to get to know people. I'm not real picky when it comes to looks, so I'll usually give most guy at least a couple of dates to win me over. It's not that I see NO future with them, but just that I'm not about to get all headspun over someone I barely know.

 

The end goal is to find someone to spend my life with. But in the beginning, I think all dates should be casual.

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Jayar Experienced

Jayar

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I separate my "casual dates" from "long term potential" and within a very short time a guy is out of the picture, or becomes either a "boyfriend" or someone I spend time with in between boyfriends. In order to become a boyfriend they have to be attractive (to me) with common life goals and values, and be INTERESTED in pursuing a relationship with me. In order to become someone I spend time with in between boyfriends they basically have to be attractive (again, to me) respectful, and fun, but maybe don't have common goals or have vices that I just don't want to deal with for the long term. It's just nice to be able to hang with guys like this sometimes, with no pressure.

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hosswhispra Mentor

hosswhispra

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^ You know some dates do feel like job interviews. Especially when the first time you meet someone and that first time is considered the date (e.g. online dating/introduction). I personally like it when I build a rapport with someone over time (friends first) and then everything falls naturally into place.

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boomvang Apprentice

boomvang

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I went out with a woman who was 6 foot tall, if for no other reason than to see what that would be like. She didn't like me (I'm 5-9) but I didn't care. Weird thing is, later a woman I'd known for years who is 6-1 took a shine to me and we had a physical relationship for a few months. I dated two beautiful 35-year-olds and several (also beautiful) women who were over 50. Some liked to cook, some liked to travel, some liked to ...*ahem* well you know, etc etc. See the cool things you get to experience when you casual date? By the way, I don't do it any more - been with the same lady for over 2 years.

 

One word? "protection" Use it.

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rikka Community Regular

rikka

Posted
Posted
^ You know some dates do feel like job interviews. Especially when the first time you meet someone and that first time is considered the date (e.g. online dating/introduction). I personally like it when I build a rapport with someone over time (friends first) and then everything falls naturally into place.

 

Oh yeah, they are so "job interviews". I casually dated because I was kind of bored, because I was looking for someone with potential, and to get some practice (very rarely would I refuse someone the 'first date').

 

Like Bankers24, very rarely would the "casual" dates go past 3 - then it starts to become a relationship. But playing the dating game can be fun! It leads to many fun stories.

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hosswhispra Mentor

hosswhispra

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a date is the same as a job interview, but it just lasts hours longer. the bonus of a job interview is not the chance to get naked though. so there is a difference.

 

Yeah, I would imagine getting naked after a successful 'job interview' with someone you had chemistry with would be mind-blowing and mind-altering. But what if your 'job interviews' make you feel as though you would have rather stayed at home by yourself getting naked with yourself. Yeah...that's been the extent of my experiences!

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rikka Community Regular

rikka

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^^^^ I have had a couple of those (the I wish i was home nekkid by myself, not with the other person). As I said, if nothing else, the dating game gives you some amusing stories.

 

On a side note, I am still very good friends with some of the guys i met while playing the dating game. We may not have clicked romantically, but we connected platonically - I am going to one of their weddings this summer.

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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that's why i don't date. i hate the whole what do i say thing, so i end up talking and talking. i really don't want to hear about what her and her friends do on the weekends the whole night. blah blah. chicks can talk about some of the most stupid things sometimes.

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Batya33 Grand Master

Batya33

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I don't casually date as in date just to have someone to date but I have dated more than one person at a time before I figure out or they figure out who to be exclusive with. The last time I dated just to date was in my teens. I have kissed guys I had no intention of ever dating, just for a "what the heck" experience - the last time that happened was over 10 years ago and I have not had the desire to do that again since then.

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rocio Veteran

rocio

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No offense guys, but if you approach a date thinking it's like an interview, you might not be the most fun or interesting person to date.

 

Unless you really rock at interviews. Personally, I'd rather go ice fishing naked than to go to a job interview.

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Maverick32x Proficient

Maverick32x

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I personally am all about the casual dating... I will go out with a girl a couple times to get to know them better.. usually always in the context of friends.... and I just treat them like I would a friend of mine... if things work out.. I'll keep going....

 

I can't remember the last "serious" date I went on.... I wonder if thats a bad thing...

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ghost69 Mentor

ghost69

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i usually hang out with girls and their friends and vice versa. i ask them to meet up. i never really waste a weekend on a date. it's so lame. get some drinks and loosen up. you can usually find out a lot with a couple cocktails. the tension is gone that way.

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Clementine orange Rising Star

Clementine orange

Posted
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No offense guys, but if you approach a date thinking it's like an interview, you might not be the most fun or interesting person to date.

 

Unless you really rock at interviews. Personally, I'd rather go ice fishing naked than to go to a job interview.

 

A job interview where you don't really WANT the job or NEED the job is waaaaaay different than when you desparately want/need the job.

Kinda the same with dating I think.

 

Ice fishing naked - wouldn't that be kinda cold, you know what happens to guys when they get cold don't you

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rikka Community Regular

rikka

Posted
Posted
No offense guys, but if you approach a date thinking it's like an interview, you might not be the most fun or interesting person to date.

 

Unless you really rock at interviews. Personally, I'd rather go ice fishing naked than to go to a job interview.

 

I have had some where I was seriously grilled by the guy. What do i do, what are my plans, how many kids do i want, where am i from, what kind of house do i live in/want, what kind of car do i drive, what are my career plans etc... i felt like I should have brought along a resume.

 

Most of the more "interview" like dates were with people that I had connected with through online dating sites. So it was our first "get to know you" meeting. After saying the same things about yourself 2-3 times a week, it feels very repetitive.

 

Now speed dating... that is an interesting experience in itself.

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