frances Posted March 19, 2007 Share Posted March 19, 2007 my bf broke up with me in october, when the "honeymoon phase" was start changing to more "casual feelings", after 10 months together. it was both his and my first real relationship. 2 weeks before we started talking about breaking up, he declared his love to me etc etc (which he'd almost never done in words before!), and told me he would never want to break up with me and he could'nt understand why he had thought about doing that a few months earlier (he still can't explain that). however, 2 weeks later I got little emotionally unstable for several reasons (not just him) and started to cry and talk about how he was important to me etc. 2 days later he - surprise - told me he "was'nt sure of his feelings for me" (he obviously was 2 weeks earlier???). I started the "try-to-convince-him-that-he-loves-me-talk" and it made things worse. he broke up with me, but then a few days later he changed his mind and said he wanted to try. we "tried" for another 2 weeks but he wasn't behaving like before because he still didn't know anything of what was going on in his mind, so I freaked out and said I couldn't do this. then he broke up with me again, this time for real. now it's been 5 months and we have talked a lot during this time, which I regret now when I see it hasn't led to anything good. I have only made the classic mistake of calling him and tried to convince him to be with me etc. we also have a lot of common friends so we have bumped into each other at parties etc, which most times have resulted in me yelling at him, me crying and so on. lately things have calmed down and we've had more serious talks and I have managed to behave more mature. he "can't really figure out exactly what he feels for me", and I have suggested him to at least consider to go back together but he freakes out when I want to talk about such things (he's generally really bad at talking about feelings and serious stuff), and he says he "can't be in a relationship, need freedom etc etc". however, last time we talked, we tried to decide if it was a good idea to be "friends" or to cut contact. he didn't want to cut contact but i said i wanted to (even though i don't want to). he didn't want to decide about anything so we said ok we'll see what happens, basically. no I wonder, is it too late to start the NC now in order to get him back?? have i damaged it all by being the psycho ex that calls late at night and yelles at him at parties?? Link to comment
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