Sean Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Ok, so today I got a txt message from one of my exs, saying that my girlfriend and my 'friend' have been telling her stuff that they claim that I have said. All three parties know that I don't talk about people behind their backs, I'm not that guy. If I have something to say to you, I will say it to your face. So now I am annoyed with my girlfriend and 'friend' because I do not appericate it when people put words in my mouth and spread lies about me. I have tried No Contact in the past, but that ususally fails because they annoy me and keep on annoying me until I talk to them. I have talked to them about this in the past, but they never learn. It's always drama with these three, honestly I am this close to just dropping all three of them and finding a new set of friends. Of course I can't do that to my girlfriend because she is a bit possessive, and the last time we 'broke' up she threatened to kill herself, and she actually did cut herself, so that's a whole new mess there. So, what do you guys think? I mean I am tired of the drama, they have no right to put words in my mouth and essentinally lie about what I said, and really I don't need this from 'friends' and 'girlfriends'. Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Your gf spreads lies about you? WHAT? are you sure its not the ex telling lies? gah thats horrible man!!! Link to comment
Sean Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 Your gf spreads lies about you? WHAT? are you sure its not the ex telling lies? gah thats horrible man!!! Well, I am not sure right now, but I really wouldn't doubt it, this has happened more than once, which was before we started dating. Link to comment
anggrace Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 I wouldn't believe your ex before you spoke w/ your gf. Just ask her if its really bothering you. I know it would me. Link to comment
willow2900 Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 I can't do that to my girlfriend because she is a bit possessive, and the last time we 'broke' up she threatened to kill herself, and she actually did cut herself, so that's a whole new mess there. Sorry I got to ask - are you with your girlfriend now out of pity? Out of fear of her possible reactions? Emotionally and physically? Link to comment
agent1607307371 Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 I think you need to break up with this girl. The suicide is a common manipulation technique and if you call their bluff... well. Cutting herself is not suicide. If she threatens it, tell her calmly that you will ring an ambulance but you are not getting involved in any of her drama. Ring a friend or family member of hers to go and check on her. I agree that you need a new social circle - I can't imagine that you are at all happy right now. Link to comment
EvaGina Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 I think you need to break up with this girl. The suicide is a common manipulation technique and if you call their bluff... well. Cutting herself is not suicide. If she threatens it, tell her calmly that you will ring an ambulance but you are not getting involved in any of her drama. Ring a friend or family member of hers to go and check on her. I agree that you need a new social circle - I can't imagine that you are at all happy right now. I agree 100%... Link to comment
TheFoglifter Posted March 19, 2007 Share Posted March 19, 2007 If you have yet to bring the subject up, then you should probably discuss it with your gf first. You could start off with a calm, and non-accusatory statement like "I got a strange message from my ex today -- she says you and friend said so and so, man she's crazy isn't she". I have a feeling that if you ask your gf outright if its true, you will just set yourself up for a "don't you trust me" fight, which of course indicates that it IS true. As far as the suicide thing, I think Kramer handled it best. Newman kept threatening to jump off the roof, and Kramer simply said "wave when you pass my window". Let her slice and dice, it'll take away the power of the threat. Link to comment
SummerGirl38 Posted March 19, 2007 Share Posted March 19, 2007 Wait, are you sure this couldn't be a thing of one person telling the story and with each new person relaying the same story, the story grows and grows until it is something nasty. Did you get that, cause I'm not sure I did, I'll put it this way... 1. I seen Sean at the grocery store talking to this pretty girl and I tell my friend Sarah. 2. Sarah tells her friend Mandy, Summer seen Sean at the grocery store and he was talking to this pretty girl. They were yuckin it up. I think Seans cheating. 3. And Mandy tells her friend Kim that Seans cheating with some girl he met at the grocery store. Are you sure it couldn't be a case of the above and by the time it the story finally gets back to your girlfriend it's all one big mess that was blown out of proportion? Wow, I haven't had enough coffee yet. Carry on Link to comment
TheFoglifter Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 But of all the people involved in this situation, it is his gf who deserves the highest level of trust and respect. As such, he should address her first, taking the stance that the story he heard could not possibly be true and he is annoyed at others spreading rumors. He needs to gauge her reaction to decide whether she is covering it up or not. I fear if he asks directly, it'll just launch into a "you don't trust me" argument, and then he'll NEVER be able to learn the truth. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 well, if she threatens to kill herself, you have more issues than some random text from an ex. let the ex talk all she wants. disregard the texts. if there is a problem, let your gf tell you. i'd look at getting some new women though. Link to comment
TheFoglifter Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 I've always wanted to call someone on that bluff. Link to comment
lmcfatter Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 i agree with thefoglifter. you have to trust what ur gf is saying, and talk to her. if u r staying with her out of fear that she might kill herself or hurt herself then maybe you are not staying with her for the right reasons. one thing u need to do is sit down and think of the reason you stay with her. you should be with her cuz u love her. but anyway i think you should confront both of them separately, and then decide who you believe is telling the truth Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 tell her you are going to kill yourself if you stay with her. she will be forced to let you go? sound rational? yeah, i didn't think so. she is controlling you. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.