Orange_County Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 I might like this guy and I feel he looks at me back...the problem is I can't talk to him, He works at the same place as me but I just say hi and bye everyday. He dosen't do any effort to get closer than that. I am not sure if he is really interest. I let guys to get close to me if they are interest but this time I feel like if I dont do it myself ..NOTHING WILL HAPPEN Mabye I am wrong and he dosent even like me...but he looks at me for more than 5 seconds. He seems shy and quiet but any ways...should I just stay like this? Is he really interest if he dosent make any move than loong looks? I think I like him but HE is not doing anything please any advice...help Should I just go and talk to him or just wait for him to do something? Link to comment
Jayar Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 People will say to approach him, but I personally wouldn't. Maybe give him a little wink or something, or a coy smile (okay so it SOUNDS corny, but man if you can pull it off you make their hearts jump, LOL) and if he doesn't take THAT and run with it? I think it's fairly safe to say at that point he isn't interested, or he's seeing someone. Link to comment
Karhu Posted March 16, 2007 Share Posted March 16, 2007 woman have it easy, they can just use their body language, give the look, and the smile and he'll come. it's also easy to start light convesations with someone, especially if they are working at the same place, small talk about your day, or the boss etc can break the ice. just a side note, what type of job are you working in? if it's a professional qualified job then messing around with staff is a strict no no. your work reputation is more important, and it can destroy your career. so it's best not to date people at work. however if it is a non-professional place (restaurant, supermarket etc) it is easy just to move to another job if things turn sour, and so then just go for it. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 well, I work in a professional qualiified job I guess...but not too formal I am a graphic designer.Anyways It's not well seeing to mess arround..you are right though. That's the thing! it's like there is not a proper time to go in his office and have a talk. His office is just by mine...I mean I have to look back to get to see him. I spend all day here doing my stuff same thing with him. The only time we can met is walking arround the other offices. BTW he dosent talk to me...sometimes he looks down when I pass behind and try to look at him closely. I guess it's better to stay away....cuz it's not a good option to date people at work, but I like him. He seems nice and cute Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 16, 2007 Author Share Posted March 16, 2007 I don't know.. I guess I just like the show I c you live close to it Link to comment
theclockman Posted March 17, 2007 Share Posted March 17, 2007 im in the exact same situation, except, its a girl i like, and im a guy if i had the balls then i would go talk to her, but i dont have them, except the eye contacts are not very long, we seem to constantly make eye contact, but just for a second or two, then we carry on doing what were doing, but otherwise its the EXACT same lol. If youve got the bottle, ask him, even if he doesnt like you, he will be flattered that you showed an interest. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 17, 2007 Author Share Posted March 17, 2007 im in the exact same situation, except, its a girl i like, and im a guy if i had the balls then i would go talk to her, but i dont have them, except the eye contacts are not very long, we seem to constantly make eye contact, but just for a second or two, then we carry on doing what were doing, but otherwise its the EXACT same lol. If youve got the bottle, ask him, even if he doesnt like you, he will be flattered that you showed an interest. you should do what you advise me to do!!! for you guys is so much easier. I mean is so boring to just wait for something that mabye will never happen.. if none make any move...are you going to be like that for ever? just eye contact and?? I'd like to know what is going on!! but it seams that there is no time for me to approach him. I wont waist time dreaming about how it could be...I want real actions!! Now that you tell me you are going through the same situation I started thinking mabye he is a little shy to come talk to me. But...How can I know? clockman...you should get the courage and do something it's really boring having eye contact for a looong time. I am sure thoses looks mean something. So go ahead and forget the shyness In my case I dont know if i would do more than keep on giving him eye contact or a coy smile. He should take the iniciative after this! Link to comment
Altruist Posted March 17, 2007 Share Posted March 17, 2007 The guy is probably shy Orange County. Help him out by taking the initiative. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 well..tell me the truth....do you really like if a girl take the initiative? I am not sure if a guy can be that shy to the point of not talking to a girl he likes. Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 You are right to be unsure. I am shy myself, but when I really like someone I initiate the eye-contact and the smiling and find a way, some way, to start a conversation. My mind may say, "Just who do you think you are? She's not interested.", but my heart won't listen and I can't help letting my feelings show. Try this; smile at him, ask him how he is doing, small talk, if he doesn't relax and pick-up the conversation, forget it, it's not going anywhere. He is either: 1. Not interested, in which case, estás perdiendo el tiempo. 2. He likes you, but not enough to overcome his shyness, which means he puts higher value on his insecurity than on you. Move on. Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 Maybe give him a little wink or something, or a coy smile (okay so it SOUNDS corny, but man if you can pull it off you make their hearts jump, LOL) Don't you know it. And it also takes our breath away, literally. Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 18, 2007 Share Posted March 18, 2007 well..tell me the truth....do you really like if a girl take the initiative? I used to think that it would be so wonderful if women asked men out, but as I have gotten more confident I would now advise strongly against it. We men are problem-solvers; we can't achieve true happiness until we feel ourselves capable of dealing with life's problems, emotional, financial, social, whatever. If he truly likes you and doesn't have the courage to approach you, just how well does he function in other areas of his life? Do you want a weak, indecisive person as your partner? Believe me, you don't want to be his mother, solving his problems for him. As I advised earlier, test the waters some more and then move on. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 18, 2007 Author Share Posted March 18, 2007 I used to think that it would be so wonderful if women asked men out, but as I have gotten more confident I would now advise strongly against it. We men are problem-solvers; we can't achieve true happiness until we feel ourselves capable of dealing with life's problems, emotional, financial, social, whatever. If he truly likes you and doesn't have the courage to approach you, just how well does he function in other areas of his life? Do you want a weak, indecisive person as your partner? Believe me, you don't want to be his mother, solving his problems for him. As I advised earlier, test the waters some more and then move on. Wow! that's a great advice! thanks a lot that was exactly my doubt...I mean, at this point I migth think He dosent really like me to get the courage and come talk to me. Nobody is that shy when it comes about a girl you like! Also as you say before, if He really likes me and dosent make any "small" step to cut the ice between us...well He should probably act like this in some other situations in his life. I dont want to waist time...I want a guy that really likes me! I will stop this and forget about it!...I really find him atractive and cute, but mabye He is not the one I am looking for....He is not showing me enough interst!! I will find the right guy for me! And thanks as well for the advise about girls asking guys out.....I always let the guy come but in this situation I am ...I've been wating for this guy to do something for 2 weeks...so I started thinking about me going and do something....but now I doubt I wil...I will just stop it and forget!! as I mentioned before I want someone who really likes me!! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 i never mix flirtation in a workplace. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 20, 2007 Author Share Posted March 20, 2007 i never mix flirtation in a workplace. It's better like that...isn't it? BTW I found out 2 things today...it's his birthday and he turns 24...OMG I am 28...so I will definitely forget about all this!!! anyways..I will go and say Happy birthday to him !! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 work is just one of my 'off limits' things. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 20, 2007 Author Share Posted March 20, 2007 work is just one of my 'off limits' things. what do you mean about "off limits"? Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 it is one thing i don't do. i won't date a woman that has kids. i won't date a woman that i work with. i won't meet a woman from the internet and date her. those are pretty much my off limits things. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 20, 2007 Author Share Posted March 20, 2007 Dont be so drastic!...you never know if you would like a woman at work...and also you dont know if you would fall in love with a woman with children. And about the internet thing I agree with you, I wouldnt date a guy I meet from the internet. Never say "never" My off limits things would be a loooong list : dating a guy younger than me, going out at night alone, having an affair with a guy who has a GF, asking a guy out...I think that's pretty much my off limits things Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 20, 2007 Author Share Posted March 20, 2007 it wouldnt bather me dating a gut at work as long as we work in different departments. And also what are the pros about it? It's not that bad!!...if it dosent work out...you can do NC and thats all!! Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 20, 2007 Share Posted March 20, 2007 i am saying never cause those are my off limits. i will never do them. if i found a girl and hit it off, then found out she has kids, see ya. sorry. just not my thing. and there are a lot of businesses that if they find out you are dating, they will clip both of you out of their fall calendar. you're fired. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 20, 2007 Author Share Posted March 20, 2007 well...you might be right about that..cuz there is a case like that here. There is this woman who works here ( her name is miren); she started dating a guy who works here as well...the boss found out about it. Wow! he was so upset specialy with Miren cuz she's been working here for like 2 years now...the guy is new. He yelled at her so bad...the thing is that they broke up because of this, but I dont agree with this at all...I mean you can do both things without loosing anything. She dropped him cuz she said to him "If i have to choose between you or my job I decide to stay with my job"...OMG (I know all the story cuz the guy is kind of friend of mine and told me the whole story) I think Miren took a bad decition. The boss was mostly mad at her cuz this guy spent most of the time at her office and she wasnt concentrating at her work...but please...you can change this and do your job well without broken up with the guy! The fact is that you may be right about your off limits things....but sometimes it just happened!! And i have a question....if you really like a woman and then find out she's got kids...would you sincerely say good bye to her? Have you been in this situation? I migth think like you at this point cuz I wouldt date a guy with kids...but I havent been in the situation so I cant say "I definitely" would never Link to comment
Skylab Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 it wouldnt bather me dating a gut at work as long as we work in different departments. And also what are the pros about it? It's not that bad!!...if it dosent work out...you can do NC and thats all!! It's very easy to start a conversation with someone at work and if it doesn't work out, you all act like adults and move on. Been there, done that and I'm still alive. Just be polite and respectful. Link to comment
ghost69 Posted March 21, 2007 Share Posted March 21, 2007 sometimes it doesn't just happen. i don't let it happen. what are you not understanding about my 'off limits' things? i refuse to let it happen. you don't just all of the sudden start dating out of nowhere. Link to comment
Orange_County Posted March 21, 2007 Author Share Posted March 21, 2007 sometimes it doesn't just happen. i don't let it happen. what are you not understanding about my 'off limits' things? i refuse to let it happen. you don't just all of the sudden start dating out of nowhere. Well, I c your point of view is different than mine. I have things that I would never do... one of those things is Not dating guys younger than me.....well It happened once! and I didn't want to...but it just happened. I guess I am a bit more flexible than you! Link to comment
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