12 Days NC and...

[trooperbsb]

Hey everyone! I thought we needed some upbeat news so here it is. My ex-gf broke up with me 12 days ago. Althought it hurt for a few days I really think it was for the best. I immediately went to NC the moment she walked out the door and haven't gone back since. Yes, intially I did NC as a last ditch effort to get her back but as the days rolled on, I thought wow, she really did me a favor. I wasn't happy with the relationship for there was serious lack of affection on her part. She is a work-a-holic and I was always part of her schedule. She was rarely spontaneous and liked routine. This of course is the kiss of death for any relationship. Evenmore, our lives never became intertwined even after 10 months of dating. On the weekends when she would sleep over she would get up, get dressed, and leave. No breakfast together, no spending our Sunday's just lounging or doing our own work together, nothing. This really tore me apart and I felt like I had a one night stand every weekend with the same person. She is finishing up her last semester of college while I finished a semester early and have begun a career as a teacher. I thought perhaps one or two nights a week we could eat dinner, either at the house I am living in or in the college dining hall. I didn't want to smother her, realized she still wanted to be a college student and enjoy her senior year (just as I did) but thought this was a compromise. I mean honestly, who doesn't want to eat with their significant other at least a few nights a week? Anyway, the straw that broke the camels back was my birthday. My birthday was over February break (we both had it off) and I was going to spend a few days with my parents. Just before I left she said she had planned to drive down to my house for my birthday. If she did this though "we would not be able spend the next two weekends together" as she would have to work on her thesis. I said well, you have free time this week, no distractions, why don't you stay and finish everything up. Yes, this hurt, and wasn't what I wanted to say, but I wanted what was best for her. Anyway, it became clear to me that work would always be top priority. If the roles were reversed and I was working on my thesis, well, I would have not only come down for her birthday but would have made a weekend of it, even if it meant a few late nights. As my NC days rolled by this became clear. At first I thought my expectations were too high but honestly, the more I read and talk to other people about relationships I see they were not. If anything they were too low. Anyway, yesterday afternoon I was doing some work at my house and began thinking of what I wanted to do for dinner. I thought, hmmm, I have this whole house, with a full kitchen, and it sure would be nice to cook for someone. So I called a classmate who is currently a student teacher, who I have always had a little thing for, and invited her for dinner. She came over, looked VERY good, had dinner, and talked till 11:30. Is this the start of something great? Perhaps! I don't intend to rush into anything but based on our conversation last night, things are looking good.