Grr, jealousy!

[rebeccaapple]

Gosh, it's the worst of all emotions! So unproductive and mean and ridiculous. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now, but today I felt horribly jealous because I looked on the myspace account of somebody that he admitted to having a crush on whilst we were going out (it caused problems at the time, but we got over it - this was about eight months ago) but arh, I really gave myself a hard time today. I thought I didn't get jealous anymore, as I've grown to know myself better it's an emotion that pretty much got left behind. Or so I thought!

 

Anyway, I didn't worry that he would get with her, because we are stable, but I just kept comparing myself to her! Which is worse, and so terribly pointless. I sort of tortured myself thinking about how pretty, cultured and intelligent she was, whilst knowing full well the whole thing was bound to upset me. The thing is, a) rationally I know that I am a good person and wouldn't want to be anyone else, b) I don't want to compare myself to anyone anyway, and c) she seems like a lovely girl and I want to be able to look at her in a way that isn't tainted with mean ole' jealousy.

 

So I have banned myself from myspace. I'm going to a party on Friday and she will be there, and I really hope I can have a good time and not get jealous. Is there any way to control it? I know that when you're secure in yourself it disappears, but there are occasions.. hmm, when it pops up and you're not expecting it.

 

Advice m'dears?

 

xxx

[JynX]

In my opinion, jealousy is a human emotion. We all feel it, no matter how secure we are with ourselves, whether we all choose to admit it or not. I'm not a very jealous person, but yes, sometimes the emotion does slap me unexpectadly...and yes, it is annoying. It comes out sometimes with my boyfriend when other girls are around and are checking him out. I know they're not threats, but that annoying twinge is still there nontheless.

 

I think jealousy is directly related to feeling protective over our SO.

 

At the party, just try to enjoy yourself. You're bound to see the girl & feel that twinge, but try to brush it off. Unless you have substantial evidence of your boyfriend being seriously interested in her, all jealousy will do is cause problems. And hey, remember: he's with you, not her

[numbhead]

jealousy is bar far the worst emotion in the book...... i get jealous of things far too easily!! that is one of my bad points!

 

i think if you are truly happy in yourself and your life you will not become jealous! try making yourself happy... work on your issues and try and get out of that awful mindset of "i wish i was like that... i wish i had that etc" that is what i am trying to do!

 

its like when you see a really famous person with lots of money... fantastic life... women at their feet etc etc... i try to look from another perspective.... like "ye but are they really happy?" and who cares good luck to them... they may die nxt wk from cancer or a plane crash.... then what is there to be jealous about! lol