redrose85 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Have you ever gotten a gift, from your SO or otherwise, that much as you try to like it, you just can't? my bf was all super freaking excited and made me open his gift (anniversary), he had MADE me tell him I wanted a ring (it is extremely hard for me to say what I really want, I tend to shut down when someone asks what I would like) so he was bugging me all day saying how much I was gonna like it, etc... The one thing I have wanted from him every birthday and holidy thus far, has been a promise ring, it symbolizes a lot to me. So I finally gave in and opened it, and it was a cross pendant. I'm trying not be be bratty here, but a freakin cross? I just find it to be ugly and oversized and I said I loved the chain, but I can't wear a cross, it just feels wrong as I don't exactly follow religion anymore. He said he didn't see the religious aspect of it... I feel like a brat, but I just don't think I can wear it, much as I would like to, it wouldn't feel right. The clasp already broke on it, and went flying off somewhere, so the necklace doesn't like me either! lol. ohh I feel so bad about this, but I really don't like it. Should I tell him? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 If not wearing the gift is more important than really hurting his feelings then sure - go ahead and tell him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I think it would be nice if you just wore it when you saw him on your dates, and leave it home otherwise. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I think it would be nice if you just wore it when you saw him on your dates, and leave it home otherwise. My thoughts exactly. I think a lot of people are really nervous about shopping for their SOs because they really want to please ... saying something will make him feel like a terrible failure! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsallgrand Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 No, don't tell him. Let it be a lesson to speak up next time someone asks you what you want. lol. Wear it, at least sometimes around him, and get your giggles looking into his face all proud of how good he done finding something just for you. Ohh. If you only knew how many people are so much worse about giving appropriate gifts! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrose85 Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Yeah that would be easy enough, but we work together, and are together most days lol. Meaning, if I don't have it on (after the clasp is fixed) he'll want to know why, and I can't lie. At all. The thing is, I did speak up, but apparently he mostly heard "something sparkly and shiny" "Wear it, at least sometimes around him, and get your giggles looking into his face all proud of how good he done finding something just for you." Lol I love that! So... I should not tell him (again) that I really don't feel right wearing a cross, except around my grandmother... and would prefer a different shape? it would still be a necklace, and the same brand, but a different shape, like a heart or circle or something a little less chaste What do you think about that? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I dunno, maybe just wear it once a week then and if he asks why you don't wear it everyday, just say that you like to "mix it up" and not wear the same stuff everyday. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sophie274 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 You could also tell him you are saving it for "special occasions" - ie when you dress up for him when you go on dates or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 I have to say that I think it is somewhat tacky to tell anyone, especially a SO, that you don't like the gift they chose for you and then go on to tell them what they should have got. The other problem is that he may well decide never to buy you another gift in case you don't like anything he gets you - even if it is a promise ring. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annie24 Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 ah, depending on your where you work, you could also say that you don't want to wear a religious symbol because you don't want to make the customers or clients feel uncomfortable. and then wear it on your dates. I agree with DN, you run the risk of him never getting you anything again. I guess the next time he insists to buy you something, be VERY SPECIFIC. in fact, maybe even show him a picture of it in a magazine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrose85 Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Yeah, I love the thought behind it, and he was so excited, so I will wear it, and wear it with pride. Silly me. Thanks for the feedback everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Yeah, I love the thought behind it, and he was so excited, so I will wear it, and wear it with pride. Silly me. Thanks for the feedback everyone.Good for you. Sometimes we put our partners first and you are a great girlfriend for realising that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aleadragonhawk Posted March 10, 2007 Share Posted March 10, 2007 Hmm. I'd honestly just tell him that I was uncomfortable with wearing a religious symbol. Personally, I'm pagan, and if my fiancee got me a cross, I'd feel really uncomfortable. I'd feel even more uncomfortable if I wore it. The issue here isn't the gift so much as a symbol of religion being inappropriate to wear if you aren't a member of that religion, or if you aren't religious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redrose85 Posted March 10, 2007 Author Share Posted March 10, 2007 Yeah, we were both raised Catholic, but no longer practice it, and we only go to church on Christmas. He didn't see it as a religious symbol, just as something that would look good on me. I'll wear it, maybe not all the time, but I will wear it. It means a lot to him Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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