How long is too long to stay married?

[joshmartin]

I've been married for 18 years.. always "taking care of everything".. I work hard, but not too many hours.. actually a dream job.. and I take care of a lot of things around the house... cleaning, laundry, dinner, grocery shopping, etc.. So my wife had an affair a couple of years ago... or I found out about it a couple of years ago.. It changed everything... It's not really about the affair anymore.. just the complete lack of feelings for the worman I married 18 years ago... arguing, etc.. I've had sex twice in 5 years... nothing left to lose.. the thing is.. my kid.. whom I'd die for.. are almost 18... I don't think I can stand it any longer though... even though I think I've almost come to the answer.. after two years.. I'm just looking for afirmation.. I feel like I have nothing left to loose.. other than the respect of my children.. which would hurt.. I appreciate any advice..

[joshmartin]

that was "kids"... plural

[Gunther]

hmm... well, it sounds like you need to talk to her about it before you do anything to big. go to marital counsaling, if that doesnt work the only thing left to do is go through the divorce system. Thats all I got...

[joshmartin]

thanks.. i forgot to mention.. two rounds of marriage couseling.. at my insistence... nothing came out of it.. except me being able to talk..

[Gunther]

sounds as though all that can be done has, well looks like there is only one option left. although I would tell your wife one last time and sit her down and ask her what she thinks about it. then if she doesnt respond then it looks like its time for a divorce.

[joshmartin]

so i had the talk... i guess she's in denial... seems like i need to serve papers to get her to understand.. kinda scared.. i guess that's what she's counting on..