Still no luck, is it all in my head?

[Landonn]

Ok, I'm 17, and I've only had one partner, and I shouldn't be worrying, but my sexual stamina is really concerning me. We've been having sex for over 8 months now, and apart from the odd time, I only can last sadly up to 2-3 minutes. Aside from lasting this long, the second time I usually last so long that I dont even get to finish before my partner loses interest, she loves me and says she doesn't care that we have to do it twice, but...

 

There are other times when we only have time to do it once, and honestly, it would be such less of a hastle we didn't have to stop and wait a couple minutes to do it a second time. Iff i could only hold out for an extra 2-4 minutes so my parter can get her share of pleasure also it would be perfect.

 

I've tried so much, including numbing condoms, but my partner has sworn that off considering I dont feel a thing when we use it. Is it all in my head? am I putting too much pressure on my unit? Should I consult to those phony herbal supliments? What can i do!?!

 

Any help/suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

[blender]

Don't take any of those herbal supplements, they can have a long term side effect, and you have to remember that a guy at your age is going to naturally not last too long, it's just a sign of how healthy you are, and you can also tell your girlfriend, she's so sexy you can't help it.. because the fact is, it's not really something you can control easily at your age.. it takes time, and using your "mind" during the act to "as they say, think of baseball" for a few minutes.. (keep this thought to yourself of course) and you will eventually learn how to "hold off" a bit longer the first time around by using your mind to slow you down a bit, but this takes some "practice".. so don't worry about "finishing to fast" it's NORMAL AND NATURAL at your age to be experiencing this.

 

don't mess with medicines, or herbal remedies, even thought the herbal stuff is listed as "natural" (remember even cocaine comes from a plant) any "natural herb" still has the potential to be harmful on your "bodies natural progression" so be careful, and just relax, and have a sense of humor and truthfullness about the whole thing, it's a normal phase, enjoy it, and give yourself a break on how much pressure you choose to focus on the "if only" and just think instead: "how wonderful we have this chemistry together, and it will only get better with time, understanding and love".

 

Talking about it too much will only take away the joy of just going with the flow, so what if you finish earlier than you'd like, you can still both love and encouarge, respect and enjoy each other.. there's no absolute way it has to go... so keep the communication and fun alive.. it's healthy and normal to experience this phase in your physically testoterone changing growing male body... dont' change it, go with it.. and in time you will see how wonderful it is to just be YOU... and respect her feelings at the same time.. you just adjust and take care of yourself and each other..

[Landonn]

Thanks blender,

Ill just try not to think about it as much. I think at this point in time it's just beginning to be so common for me to finish fast that I'm psyching myself out from the git-go. I guess I'll just have to look at the bright side, a year ago I thought I'd be a virgin forever (lol).

I'll start from the drawing board again I guess.

This sort of thing just bugs me because I'm past the point of experimenting newly with sex, and I've experienced "making love" and now more concerned that my partner has just as much pleasure as I'm having.

But thanks, I'll just try to relax.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

ALSO, possibly could this be part of this?

Maybe I'm just getting wayy too excitied? Going through the first stages of puberty in my very young teen years, I seemed to get "excited" at the first look of nudity. Now I've learned to control myself with age, but it seems even when just watching tv or relaxing, almost a minute after her getting into my bed with me, I'm up and raring to go, without even really thinking about anything. Could this be related in any way to me not lasting long?

[Aurian]

I hear that it is possible to retrain yourself. Do you self-pleasure as well? When you do, you probably try get yourself off as quickly as possible, which teaches your body to do the same when you are with a partner. Perhaps when you are alone when you feel yourself about to come, stop what you're doing and control yourself. You can get practice at noticing your reactions and also retrain your body to slow down.

[blender]

Everything you are describing from your "first thought" and the excitement, and readiness, is NORMAL, AND NATURAL you can already see a change in just the last few years..right? So trust that you are healthy, you're fortunate to be physically excited and raring to go..all the while being respectful and aware...

 

it's so GREAT that you are aware and respectful of her feelings as well.. this combined with your natural physical progression is a wonderful maturing direction to be going..

 

be proud of yourself, relax, enjoy yourself and respect yourself and her, and just go with it, and if you "finish before you want to" then just say to her, "you're so sexy, I can't help myself...and keep kissing and loving her during this "post" moments.. and as you've experienced it leads to another "round" so to speak...and if it doesn't that's okay too.. there is always "next time"...

 

Remember growing up physically and emotionally is not a 'sprint" it's a "marathon" so pace yourself, and give yourself some credit for just being healthy and normal...

 

You will look back at this time in your life when your fifty and say 'that was so wonderful".... so enjoy it, don't try to "hurry up" and change it...you're doing fine, just fine...

[Jayar]

I think Blender has GREAT advice... Do work on your timing though, because as you get older (as in your mid to late 20's) you will be expected to be able to allow your partner to finish first. Men who, in their mid 20's already (once they've supposedly had 5+ years of experience for the most part) still can't hold off for more than a few minutes are generally going to be regarded as selfish.

[Landonn]

Thanks again guys.

I'll try to just relax. I've never looked at it as being healthy before, that's a very good point.

I'll try your advice, may not need it this weekend considering it's my grad year and parties and alcohol pretty much flip my whole problem upside-down (lol). But I'll check back hopefully with some results, I'm guessing this sort of thing takes time and a heck of a lot of practice. But before I start rambling again,

Thanks again guys.