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New to this whole thing.....big quandry!!!


jordan1234
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So i met this girl on a dating site. I sent her an email. She sent an email to me. We started emailing each other for about three dyas. She seemed great. Now I am not a shy person, and felt that the emailing was sort of killing what would be a very cool first date so i asked her to grab a drink one night. She was psyched and agreed. we made plans and she gave me her phone #.

 

The first time we were supposed to meet she had to reschedule due to working too late, but we quickly made it for another night. Then the night we were supposed to meet.....she stood me up. I text'd her at the bar and got a text back saying she was sorry but she had just got out of work and that her scheduel was busy lately. I sent a text saying well how about a drink? Nothing.....then i sent a text saying no big deal, but if you want to meet up sometime let me know. Now I'm new to this stuff, and this is the only girl i have found mildly interesting. Should i let this go? Send her an email? She seemed so into it? Is this typical?

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I have no idea if it is typical but if I were you I would forget her and move on. That sort of behaviour when you haven't even met is an indicator of how she will behave in the future.

 

Sorry - but better luck next time.

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Yeah, thats kind of where I am. I'm not upset or anything and it is true that she really didn't give me much of an apology, although if i took her for her word, she had JUST gotten out of work. But, she agreed on the day. I did see pictures of her, and everything seemed legit.

 

I guess what sucks is that I was pretty unsure about the whoel online thing in general (I am really not a shy person, but just do not g out as much as i used to), but thought i would give it a shot. The nature of my job i have to be a little secretive so i dont have a pic posted but i sent her one. She seemed happy after it for sure. I guess its just weird how it went down.If she contacts me again then I'll weigh my options maybe, but definitely no e-mail to her right?

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If it was me, I wouldn't initiate anymore contact with the person.

 

If they contacted me, I'd be polite & friendly but a little distant. If they suggested getting together and I still felt like meeting them, I'd let them pick the day/time/place....and then I'd hold no expectations of them actually following through.

 

If I didn't feel like meeting them (or I was legitimately busy at the time they picked), I'd politely but firmly decline the invitation and get on with my life.

 

The bottom line is this: at this point, you should both be in "first impression" mode...that means on your best behavior, presenting the best possible version of yourself. If she's being this flaky now, what'll it be like when she's comfortable? Do you really want to find out?

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