HELP!! I feel challenged when it comes to dating

[wishfulthinking]

Hello everyone,

well if you read a few of my past posts, they have mostly been about my ex, which i think i am finally really getting past. Ive met a few guys here and there..no one special, but i think i have finally gotten to the point where i enjoy being single, which it took me hmmm almost two years to achieve.

 

So about 3 days ago, for my friends birthday I met a guy at a club who i instantly clicked with. We had a great time, and we started talking nonstop ever since. He took me out on a date as well yesterday, and was a perfect gentleman. I had a really great time. But for some reason i felt SO scared. I feel like this may actually go somewhere and I have never felt that since my ex who i broke up with almost 2 years ago.

 

My prohlem is that I feel like im getting scared that things are happening a little to fast for my pace. When I do this, I try extremely hard to find the flaws in the guy, making that an escuse not to talk to him anymore. He wants to hang out again tongiht which I want to do, but then again I don't to take things to fast because knwowing me i will get sick of him for being soo easy accesible (as horrible as that sounds its true i love a guy whos hard to get.....i wish i wasn;t that way) Other then that so far im rreally attracted to him and I really am curious, yet scared to see where this may go. Anyone who can offer me some advice on how to handle this?

[ghost69]

what is the problem? lol. the only thing that is wrong is he is really into you? weird you are worried in any way.

[wishfulthinking]

i think my problem is that now that after all this time being single and thinking that i wanted a boyfriend, now that i have the opportunity i dont feel like im really that ready!!

 

but i feel torn because im not used to this whole serious dating thing and it actually somewhat scares me because i barely know him. ive known him fo maybe 2 weeks and we talk every day....which is so not somthing i am used to. im just used to having guy friends and occasionally a couple of those friends would be a "friends with benefits" kind of relationship.

 

another problem is that i have two FWB relationships still going on. one of which i actually have alot of feelings for. i hang out wiht him all the time and we do occasionally hook up. i dont know if im even ready to give that up because he is such a good friend of mine.

 

The reason why this sucks is because this new guy ive been dating is wonderful! he really likes me and enjoys to see me as often as he can. makes me kinda feel special. i am also really attracted to him which makes it all better ....along with a great personality. i barely know him though and its getting to serious to fast. im so used to having time for myself and i love that. i love that i can do whatever i want without having to inform someone. and because this guy constantly asks me wut i am doing, i feel like hes becoming to available which makes him less unattractive. please tell me what i should do, i really want things to work out with him but i dont know if i am ready for it

[cpc28655]

I can understand where you are coming from. I am going though almost the same thing. In my case however, its a divorce. That's all I'm going to say, lol.

[Batya33]

You can pace it - don't talk to him every day - tell him you enjoy talking with him but have things going and want to take things slow - see him once a week, maybe twice, but not more. As far as the FWB if things get intimate with this guy you owe him the information that you are having sex with someone else so he can decide how to deal with the STD risk.

[ghost69]

yeah, just tone it down.