johnnynz Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 My ex dumped me nearly a year ago now and we 'got back together' (notice the quotes) about 1.5 months ago. She well and truly broke my heart into a million pieces when we broke up, I was a wreck. She dated some other guy for a few months, we kept in casual contact and then somewhat mutually decided to give things another go not long ago. It was all good at first, we went out lots together again, I was happy. However there was still a sign of lingering doubt from her. I really do love her to bits, and want nothing more than things to work out for us. I want to have a family and settle down with her, but to be completely honest I can't see things working, as she doesn't seem in to it in the least. She tells me she loves me one week then the next doesn't seem to care even for my friendship. Whenever I push for any sort of commitment she runs away claiming I'm smothering her or that she's 'not sure', or that she still 'wants to take things slowly'. I don't think this is in the least fair on me, and really want an answer whether she wants us or not. The main reason we broke up in the first place was because neither of us could be bothered putting in the effort required to maintain the relationship, so as a result, it withered away and died. We argued daily, got on each others nerves (moreso me on hers than her on mine) and generally didn't get on. We get on so much better now but I can see things declining again, in full due to her unwillingness to put in the effort required (yet again) to make things work. Nothing I do seems to be good enough for her. I'm not really sure what to do. She really doesn't seem in to it and has so many doubts about us. When things are going well, she makes me so happy. But then when things are going badly, I get really anxious and she makes me so unhappy. Is she the one? I'm starting to get the feeling she's not good for me - or we're not good for each other. It's just so hard to accept, since I really do love her. I find a lot of people who give up on love very easily. If you truly truly believe that this is the one then fight for them. You might win/ lose but twenty years from now you will not look back and say " I wish I had fought for what I wanted." I think I can truly say that I've put my heart and soul into making it work this second time around, and have no regrets. I might get hurt more if we part ways again but I reckon at least I won't be saying 'I wish I'd done this/that'. Is the answer clear or should I keep fighting for what I love? Quote Link to comment
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