is it true, if u love it set it free if it comes back its urs for the taking?

[survival21]

been thinking about this question a lot lately. Especially this past weekend.

 

After many dreadful days, hard nights, and long months i actully got to hang out with my ex. Many of yall might rememeber my troubles back in august and i have been posting here and there about NC. But let me give a quick recap for those that dont.

 

gf broke up with me in aug of '06 of course devistated. Went no contact for about 3 months straight and i mean no talking or anything. She was invited to my brothers wedding (when we were dating at the time) which occurred this past dec (she stood in it...i know tell me about it). She was at the rehearsal dinner prior to the wedding we talk for about 10min which offically broke my NC. Then went back into NC the next day. the wedding came. Didnt really talk to her at all at the wedding it was just a hi. And stayed no contact up until this past week which was monday (feb 26). We talked on the internet just catching up. she invited me to her party which was friday of the same week. I thought hard about going or not and ended up going. We had a few drinks hooked up. I found out things i didnt want to know. which hurt some but i prepared for that while in NC. She seemed really into before the party and then she was really into me at the party but that could or could not have been the drinks. We shared are thoughts and i invited her to come over to my place tomorrow (monday) to talk about things.

 

Now this is where my title comes into play. I loved her and i let her go for 6 months straight it was hard but it was well worth it. Now she presents herself back into my life. She talked first to me on that monday we spoke online and kept it up through out the week and then the party came. She came back into my life first.

 

But now i do not want her. So if this is turning out what it maybe... should i take her because she may be mine for the keeping. I still do not see that and that doesnt make me want her even more if anything it will just bring more drama into my life

[Akatea]

It is absolutely TRUE. There are reasons for it, that I can't really explain. But the saying is SO SO SO TRUE!! Just be weary. Don't give completely of yourself back to her unless you YOURSELF know they are for the right reasons

[lovesickkk]

you just said "I don't want her."

 

that should be enough for you, if it's not there, don't force it.

[mintblossom]

relationships are a two way street. both people have to want to be in it for it to actually be good and happy. if even one person will not lift a finger, it's like...trying to build a bridge with one leg. so if you set it free, and it comes back and you both want it to work, by golly it will be fine.

 

otherwise no.

[Daddy Bear]

There are no rules in love that can be counted on to hold true.

[Locke2121]

If you don't want her, then you need to carefully steer your relationship into close friend mode. Many of the world's best friendships are between former lovers. There is just something about being friends with someone that knows you so intimately.

 

So, she may still have the spark for you...don't hurt her by leading her on. A good way to let her know your intentions is by asking about her love life...anyone new, a secret crush..if not, then give her the encouragment needed to get back out there...let her know that your interested in her life, but not as a bf.

[light bulb]

Definitely don't take her back just because she's "yours for the taking." If you don't want her and you take her back, I can't see you being very happy in the long run. You'd just be selling yourself short IMO.

[LONESOUL]

I agree with oatmeal, and I love oatmeal's jumping Panda avatar!!! lol

[Orlander]

Why dont you want her? Are you prepared to get hurt again if she leaves? What do YOU want?

 

Answer these questions and you may have a better idea of what to do.

 

 

Orlander

[astaro]

thats not a panda, its a badger

[MyTeddyBear]

not always-

mine came back then left again.