stefanied26 Posted March 4, 2007 Share Posted March 4, 2007 I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years, since i was 14, im 21 now. we have always had a good relationship. He's definitely the sweetest most thoughtful guy iv ever known. The few kinks we had in our relationship were able to be worked out, except sex. not to sex we have a bad sex life, its just that i never want to have sex, maybe once a few weeks. when we do its ok, but im never really into it. i dont feel an amazing sexual connection like the movies but i figured its normal. maybe i have a low sex drive. ive even researched this topic. we have tried so many different things to try to improve things and my boyfriend is very dedicated to pleasing me. its just that it never changes that being said, 2 months ago i was hanging out at a girlfriends house for a little get together. we were all drinking with people from work, mostly who are in relationships themselves. long story short i made out with one of my co-workers (who is also in a 3 yr. relationship). it was completely exhilerating! the sexual chemistry was explosive! we had never done anything like that and i never saw it coming. after that night we started talking and we both felt that we had alot of chemistry(sexually). against my better judgement i continued to see him. we were able to get away for the weekend a few times. went to boston, jersey, upstate (i live in NY) and we have the most amazing sex! after doing this for a month i decided to leave my bf (not telling him i cheated) he diddnt take it well. i diddnt leave him because i diddnt love him anymore, but because i diddnt want to live the lie. i dont deserve someone like him. i also feel like im starting to care for him more like a friend. basically he was hysterical and unstable...we live together so i have nowhere to go. everything was so hard and painfull, i felt guilty and depressed and afer a week i decided that if i was feeling this bad maybe i did still love him in that way. i decided to give it another go. my co-worker also decided to try things again with his girl. (he broke up with her) after a few weeks we started back at it again. the attraction is out of controll! (my co-worker) now i dont think i want a relationship with him. i dont trust him for some reason. but i want to get out of my current relationship and i dont know how. it kills me to see my bf so hurt, and i dont have anywhere to live if i leave. we cant break up and live together because i kno it will never work. im so clueless so i have a few questions... why couldnt i have this kind of chemistry with my bf? if i dont is it because i dont love him that way? how can i leave? im scared cause hes all ive ever known, and i dont know how to do it. leaving him is such a life altering event, im loosing my best friend and my home. (also keep in mind im not leaving him for my co-worker) anyone have an exit stratigy? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.