KrashBurn224 Posted March 2, 2007 Share Posted March 2, 2007 My ex left me back in early December. We stayed in decent contact on-and-off over the first month or so after the split. Several times early on where I did the old beg, plead & promise routine... that of course, resulted in only pushing her further away from me. Shortly after New Years, I decided the best thing to do was to distance myself from her (basically, no contact, but we do somewhat work together so it wasn't entirely possible), work on improving all facets of my life (emotional, mental, physical, spiritual, etc.), and to move on the best I could while still maintaining some hope that we could reconcile. I made tremendous strides in my self improvement. I'm in the best shape I've been in in probably 10+ years, I've gone out on dates with several women, I've gotten back into regularly attending church, I've reconnected and spend a lot of time with many friends... But most of all, the last few weeks I've noticed much more attention being paid to me by my ex! Ultimately, this was my intended plan and my biggest hope... and it seemed to be working. So, I asked her out and we had our first date last Saturday... approximately 2.5 months since the break up. We had an amazing time... I mean it was fabulous, beyond words, almost magical. We had a great dinner, amazing conversation, talked through some of the issues of the past and really felt like we put them to rest. We talked about how we've been and how we are still attracted to each other. To cap it all off, we spent the night together and enjoyed each other sexually. Now it's Friday, almost a week later, and I have no clue where we stand or really how to proceed. We did drink during the date, and there are definitely some parts of the night that are fuzzy and/or blank for me. I'm actually somewhat embarrassed to bring that up to her, as in the few conversations we had about the date, she seems to recall everything quite clearly. We did a lunch date yesterday, and it seemed a little weird to me. We've talked positively about the date evening, but neither of us has mentioned anything about the sex, nor have we directly said anything about where we stand with each other or how to proceed next. She seemed fine throughout the lunch, so I feel a lot of it is me putting stress and pressure on myself. I certainly don't want to put any on her, but I also want to know if we're really heading down a path towards reconciliation. She's not the type to sleep around. We've both dated other people since the split... and I'm the only one that got intimate with anyone else. I think, for both of us, sex is a pretty sacred thing that isn't taken lightly... so I'm confused by the lack of discussion around it. Namely on her behalf. Is it possible she's just as scared to bring it up as I am? Am I suppose to just keep playing it cool and rolling with the punches until she starts making the definitive moves towards reconciliation? This is harder then I expected. I truly love this woman and want us to have a future together. Unfortunately, we did split up once already and second chances are hard to come by... I don't want to mess this up... What's a guy to do in such a situation??? Quote Link to comment
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