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How to tell if gf has a promiscuous past?


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Well, like someone stated before...if he were asking nearly a year after we started seeing each other, and his intention was to use it to judge me, label me as "Promiscuous"..and then break up with me...no...and if he were to break up with me for NOT answering...so be it. There are other fishes in the sea. You have a choice to ask and question you want to ask. The person being asked has a right NOT to answer. Cool eh?

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So, let me get this straight.

 

1. You don't want to ask her

2. You want to know what the number is though

3. You think if you ask her she'll lie

4. You think if you ask her and she doesn't tell you it's because she doesn't trust you.

5. If you ask her and she tells you its a number that you don't think is suitable you'll dump her.

 

How can she possibly get through this situation unscathed?

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Joe,

 

just a thought but I think this thing got such a life because it became a venting grounds for some very emotional people (You know who you are )... Not because of actual concern for the OP and his specific situation. I am interested to know if asks and if he sticks around but any more specifics than that would be a breach of her trust.

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I think the bottom line is: how much do you like this woman? Do you see it going long-term? If so, then going into her sexual past probably will get in the way of that. Aside from the fact that you're worried you won't get the truth, it may also make her uncomfortable enough to leave. The only thing that you might need to know about her sexual past is if she has any STDs that she may pass on to you and I think that is of course fair game to ask about and necessary to ask about. Otherwise, you may risk a great relationship.

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I think the OP's point is that if she's been ****ing herself self around, she's more likely to be less commital and less faithful. If it was years ago he might need to consider blowing it off. If it was recent, these are valid concerns

 

How do you figure that, who is he, or you, to say that just becuase she enjoys sex, she is unfaithfull?

 

FACT: A woman can still enjoy sex without having a commited partner.

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Oh please Andy - You know as well as I do he would be described as a stud. But whatever, that's the way it works.

 

My remarks were all made after and in response to this one. Most of the guys in this threaded have seemed pretty laid back and having fun with it while some other people have been getting VERY emotional... specifically 1 and I'm not talking about grosse vache

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Seriously, I don't care. He put a little smiley winky face to imply he was just messing about hence why I chose to ignore it rather than spout some rediculous womanly rant like I normally would.

 

But yeah, it wasn't that funny . People falling over when trying to act cool....thats funny.

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Whattheheck -

 

I am curious if there is something she did that made you wonder about the number of partners she has had 8 months into the relationship.

 

The reason i am asking is because normally this is something people ask at the beginning of a relationship, not more than half a year into it.

 

When i was younger I worried about numbers too, until I realized that in the grand scheme of things is doesn't matter. If I were in your shoes and you have concerns about her past I would just get a blood test done for the both of you.

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My remarks were all made after and in response to this one. Most of the guys in this threaded have seemed pretty laid back and having fun with it while some other people have been getting VERY emotional... specifically 1 and I'm not talking about grosse vache

 

The thing is that you can be laid back about it, because it doesn't apply to you.

 

I'm really not interested in getting into an internet argument, but what if the situation was reversed? How would you feel if someone heard your number and called you derogatory names and/or dumped you because of it?

 

Guys are allowed to have as many partners as they care to and are rewarded for it by being called "studs". Women who have had more than a guy's arbitrarily applied "acceptable" number are called (names that will get filtered out by the site). I'm surprised that anyone is arguing this. I've never seen a guy say "Hey, that girl's slept with 30 guys! She's such a..."

 

... Actually, not a single positive term for a girl that's had a lot of sex comes to mind. I think that speaks volumes.

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