WadeCure Posted February 14, 2007 Share Posted February 14, 2007 This is long and I'm sorry in advance but I'm really hurt. The past couple of days my girlfriend has mentioned marriage incredibly to me. Every single sentence she has stated seems like had marriage in it. We've only been together 4 and a half months. I would change the subject often. I feel like getting married at 4 and a half months is ridiculously early for that type of thing. So she said this to me on a MySpace message: so i dont think you realize that it really hurts my feelings when you just change the subject when i talk about getting married. you could just say no i dont want to or whatever, but what you're diong really really hurts my feelings. i love you so much and i love you enough to give you basically my life, so the least you could do is give me a straight answer Last night about 8pm (before Valentine's Day, I already got her gifts for VD. Unfortunately I'm stuck in another city for business trip so I couldn't be with her for VD) I sent this back to her because she had been bugging me for a response. Hey sweetie, First of all, I’m really sorry for all of the hurt feelings I’ve caused you by not responding directly to what you’ve been saying. I never want to hurt you - that’s my worst nightmare - and I didn’t realize that by not responding to you that I was hurting you. I’m very sorry. Anyway, I promised you a response to what you were saying and this message is that response. I’ve been dodging the question because, simply, I had no idea how to handle it. I realized that I should have handled it with honesty and open communication regardless because I feel a good relationship is based on honesty and open communication. I want to do my part and give you my honest feelings. Every one of my friends know that I’m head over heels in love with you. I’m crazy about you, there’s no denying it. About a week ago I was going to tell you something special someone said about us and our relationship, that someone being White. It really meant a lot to me to hear and I believe what he said to be true. White and I went out to dinner and a movie one night and we talked about a lot of things. I think you remembered this night. Well, White said to me something to the effect of “out of all of the relationships I have seen, I believe you and Melanie have the best relationship and the greatest chance for success.” I believe him. If we take a look at all of the relationships around us, ours is the best, without a doubt. We are two independent people who love each other despite flaws we both share. I don’t need to name names, but you know just as well as I do that there are relationships around us that are unhappy and dependent ones. We are lucky, we have one of the rare ones that aren’t that. Our relationship is wonderful and it is amazing, it is without a doubt the most important thing in my life right now. You have made a lot of not so subtle mentions of marriage. You want to be my Mrs. You can’t imagine how wonderful that makes me feel. I feel very very lucky to be with you. And you know what? I feel the same as you. I want to be with you forever. I want to marry you. There is a natural progression for things. White told me that we had the best relationship he knows, and I’m working hard to maintain that and continue to have our relationship grow into something better each day. I want to go through each step together and continue to develop our relationship until inevitably I will ask you to marry me. I don’t want to leap frog past any step. I feel that other relationships around us leap frogged many important and crucial steps to a successful and happy relationship. I don’t need to name names, you know who they are. Again, our relationship has been a successful and happy one thus far. Our relationship continues to develop better each day. I’m a very guarded person, and you know it – it’s hard for me to let my guard down. If you remember how it was back in September I told you that I was very protective of myself, and it’s true. But there was something special about you. You broke my guard down and I fell very much in love with you. The fact that you were able to do it that quickly is a testament to how wonderful I think you are. Nobody ever has been able to do that. Ever since then almost everyday has been very happy with you. I am looking forward to the infinite happy days ahead of us. One day, inevitably, I will ask you to marry me. It will happen. I want to give you the satisfaction of knowing that when I do ask you to marry me, that it was without pressure – that I 100% come to you out of my own will and ask you to be my wife. So I’m asking only for time and asking for no influence or pressure. Then I guarantee I can give you that satisfaction and ultimately a very happy, loving, and fulfilling lifelong marriage. It’s funny that a Britney Spears song can reflect how I feel right now. Normally it’s Nine Inch Nails. But hey… you know… what can I say lol ^-^. But here comes the lyrics to that: Sometimes ---- You tell me you're in love with me Like you can't take your pretty eyes away from me It's not that I don't want to stay But every time you come too close I move away I wanna believe in everything that you say 'Cause it sounds so good But if you really want me, move slow There's things about me you just have to know Sometimes I run Sometimes I hide Sometimes I'm scared of you But all I really want is to hold you tight Treat you right Be with you day and night Baby all I need is time I don't wanna be so shy Every time that I'm alone I wonder why Hope that you will wait for me You'll see that you're the only one for me I wanna believe in everything that you say 'Cause it sounds so good But if you really want me, move slow There's things about me you just have to know Sometimes I run Sometimes I hide Sometimes I'm scared of you But all I really want is to hold you tight Treat you righ Be with you day and night Baby all I need is time Just hang around and you'll see There's nowhere I'd rather be If you love me, trust in me The way that I trust in you Sometimes I run Sometimes I hide Sometimes I'm scared of you But all I really want is to hold you tight Treat you right Be with you day and night Baby all I need is time ---- I love you, more than you could ever imagine. - Me Last night she said this: Part One: well, right now, im not sure how i feel about your response. ill think about it and reply when i get home later. Part Two (she gets home): im still not 100% sure how I feel about your response. ive re read it and still im not sure how it sits with me. i think its something i need to think about. I'm not so sure thats what I wanted to hear. About an hour and a half ago we talked on the phone. It's very awkward. She says "I'm trying to decide if I'm mad at you, I am not sure." I said "you can feel however you choose to, all I can do is be honest." Then seems like an eternity of awkward silence and then she says "well I have to go get ready for the doctor." In her voice she sounded really upset the entire time. Well I now know if she's upset. She says this just now: ........... just because i think valentines day is a stupid holiday and think its rediculous to go all out for it doesn't change the fact that i am a girl and im programmed to like these things deep down and want a little romance. but what do I get? an email saying you dont want to marry me right now because apparently our relationship isn't to that level. happy (F-Word, I censored it)ing valentines day to you too I'm UNBELIEVABLY hurt by this. I am crying right now as I type. I'm seriously considering ending it right now. You can research my past posts to see where else she's been immature, about moving in with me. I just don't know if I can continue this after that. What should I do? Quote Link to comment
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