kate111 Posted February 13, 2007 Share Posted February 13, 2007 I have come to the conclusion that what the ex was telling me about not being ready to settle down etc is probably true. Even if he did go off with some random chick. Men don't usually settle down until mid thirties do they? Is there anything you can do about this kind of man? Surely he will remember you in years to come as "the one who got away". Is there any men out there who can give me insight? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissTee Posted February 13, 2007 Share Posted February 13, 2007 I just want to say that my man is 28 and is well ready to settle down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
terk2021 Posted February 13, 2007 Share Posted February 13, 2007 I have come to the conclusion that what the ex was telling me about not being ready to settle down etc is probably true. Even if he did go off with some random chick. Men don't usually settle down until mid thirties do they? Is there anything you can do about this kind of man? Surely he will remember you in years to come as "the one who got away". Is there any men out there who can give me insight? Every man is truly different. As a man who is 35, I would say that I was not really ready to "settle down" until I was around 32. There are many different reasons why a man may or may not be ready to settle down. For me, it was career. I wanted to be established in my career and in myself before I wanted to truly commit myself to someone. I probably had 3 serious relationships that could have gone much further in my mid/late 20's, but I just was not ready. Part of it had to do with maturity. I have many friends that got married in their mid late 20's. I would say that half are still happily married, and the others said they did not feel like they experienced enough in "life" and got divorced. I am not afraid to admit it, but I would say that for the most part, women mature faster then men do. Some men do regret ending relationships for the reasons of not being ready. I did have one relationship that I regretted ending, and I did call her up about 8 months later to see how she was doing. She had moved on, as well she should have. Some men truly fear commitment until they reach a certain age. I can't even count how many tuxedos I put on for my friends wedding as best man, or in the wedding party. Not every man, but most of us wake up one day and realize that there is so much more to life than work and going out. I hope this helps... I am sure there are studies, but if I had to guess, 30 is the magic bullet where the average man is ready to "settle down". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
terk2021 Posted February 13, 2007 Share Posted February 13, 2007 As far as doing something about this type of man? It's hard. I would say the typical male has to figure things out for themselves. I think when I hit 32, I realized something was missing in my life. I have not found her yet, but I know she is out there. Timing has just as much to do with finding the right person as just simply finding the right person... Good luck, he's out there Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kate111 Posted February 13, 2007 Author Share Posted February 13, 2007 If an ex came back would you consider going out with her again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
evening_light Posted February 14, 2007 Share Posted February 14, 2007 If an ex came back would you consider going out with her again?My two cents.... When an ex leaves, why would you take them back.... Can you trust them again? Are you willing to forget about the past? Are you still hurting? And if you take them back ( why?) can you forgive them... Come on!!...after all the hurting why would you subject yourself to more pain...you're dignity is worth much more... And in time you''ll feel much better and you''ll meet someone that deserves you!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
macgyver4ever Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 This is a good question about taking an ex back. My ex treated me like garbage. She cheated on me, begged for me back, then had an affair on me for 3 months before telling me she wanted a break, then gave me mixed signals for 2 more months before finally ending it. She just ended it yesterday, but if she called me right now, asking to be back with me, I would def. have to think about it. Even if it was 2-3 months from now, and she finally got her "stuff" together, I don't know. She has hurt me too much, and I don't know if I could ever trust her. I am human, I made mistakes, but I never treated her like garbage or cheated on her. All I did was love her. So in conclusion, I have no idea. I am one of the most patient, forgiving people around, but after what I have gone through the last 5 months, I know I could not handle that pain again. They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but what about polio? MK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kate111 Posted February 15, 2007 Author Share Posted February 15, 2007 My ex wanted to have threesomes. I wasn't much into them and told him as much but never thought it would lead to us breaking up. Perhaps I should have compromised. What do you think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
macgyver4ever Posted February 15, 2007 Share Posted February 15, 2007 I would say no. Being a guy, I have thought about that before, and even teased my ex about it early in the relationship, but eventually figured out it wasn't worth the trouble. It would have ended up ruining the relationship. There would be a lot of jealousy, and would probably tear things apart. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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