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lost and confused on valentines day


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Ok, so Im new to posting but i frequently read from this forum and finally have a question of my own. I need some input from the girls on here. This might seem like the same post as a 100 others but Im lost.


I like this girl I met at school (college) Im a little bit older than her, but anyway we have become good friends and I wondered if it could go further. I talk to her frequently and she is very flirty and seems to get mad when i talk to other girls, but lately I think she likes someone else but Im not sure where i stand. She started sending me messages and stuff on her own and even has a nickname for me, but I really don't know. This girl acts really silly sometimes and you can't tell if she is serious or not.

The question is this. I went out like a sucker and bought a rose and a friendly card and am not sure if i should give both the card and rose to her or one or the other. I realize if Im wrong I am risking the friendship but on the other hand maybe it will work.


I have tried in the past, both: just asking girls out and got shut down, and last year I gave a friend a flower for sweetestday and she blew up in my face as if i had proposed and all it was, was a friendship flower. To top it off she has never spoken to me again. I have gotten the bad end of both deal, so you can understand why I hesitate. Im not an overly dramatic person just wondering if its worth it, if our friendship could be at stake.


Im confident just not sure which to give this girl that I like. "im not whinning here, I just want some feedback on what others may think. cause I can never decide on things. Just wondering what to do.

To top it off I rescently found out a friend of her's whom I barely know likes me and I dont want to wind up the bad guy in this.


Thank you all for your time and feedback. You all have a great day.

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Hmm. Well maybe you just give her the rose. Forget about the card. Bump into her and give her the rose. Look deep into her eyes and say you would like to spend more time with her soon, then leave to do something. She then gets to appreciate the gesture, but you keep her wondering a little. Keep it light.


If she gets funny about it then that's fine. You did a sweet, whimsical thing, you shouldn't feel bad about it. Nothing ventured and all that. You can walk away knowing you did a nice thing.


Just my opinion, but I wouldn't worry about the card. Cards are a pain - we woman can interpret any word or absense of a word we wanted as meaning something. I also think a card AND rose might come accross as intense. Why even go there?

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maybe you should just give her the card, but make sure you give her the option to be your girlfriend or just a friend coz that way she won't feel pressured if she doesn't want to go out with you. I think the rose might be over the top if you don't know where you stand with her. Maybe on a first date if you start going out. hope that helps. xx

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Well I already bought the red ones but I do have time to by something different, money is not an issue. But then what do I do with the red roses.

not to be negative cause I am a happy person 90% of the time, but valentines day seems like a d-mned if you do d-mned if you don't situation. Thanks again for the advice, Ill check tomorrow if anyone adds to this (i hope). I guess the main reason Im not sure is that Im a perfectionist and will endlessly debate something until im satisfied i will get the right result. If I get enough responses maybe ill even share what happens.


Last question: what should i do in the event she gets mad?

--trying to maintain the peace

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It's a sweet gesture and she shouldn't get mad. However a couple of years ago a mate of mine gave me a rose, we were good mates i used to sit next to him in history and we always had a laugh i thought he was a really nice guy admitatedly looking back should have seen the signs but was totally unaware that he liked me that way so after class he gave it to me in front of everyone i am sorry to admit it i froze mubbled its so sweet thank you loads of times i told him i had a prearranged meeting which wasn't a lie but i was grateful and i left smartly. He came in to work to ask me out like two days later and i said the dreaded words i think we should just stay mates it was weird for a while but in a way i am glad cos it allowed him to move on and didn't ruin our friendship. I still think if u don;t know how she feels don't tell her you like her so publicly. i say get a card that says i think ur awesome no L word cos that's full on or friendship cos u want more and write do you want to go out sometime? Whatever u decide let us know how it goes and good luck x

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