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it all starts over and over again...


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My life seems to repeat some kind of cicle all the time - For a few weeks or even more than a month everything feels good - the best way to waste my lonely time is painting and music and I feel like I won't need anything else - I have a boring job, I just earn enough to finance my hobbies, but that won't bring me down, I even love it...


But then I get some kind of flashback where I rememmber all my problems with girls as if they had happened just a few minutes ago and I start feeling exactly the same as I felt before I found my hobbies - I feel like I'll never get a job where I could earn enough to live in my own property or something like that, I'll never be able to meet someone because I'm too different from the others...


I've quit drinking, I don't go to bars or pubs anymore, I don't even visit clubs and that sort of things, so actually I just meet only 5 or a maximum of 6 people every day (colleagues, family)... All the friends I used to hang out with have girls, some of them are going to get married, they have good jobs, their lives are perfect, they really look like they've found the ones they're made for...


I left the univerity because my field of interests is different...


I don't want to visit art courses and that kind of hobby stuff, because it's full of 40-60 year old people (don't know anyone in my age), also our academy of fine arts is expensive as hell, I feel like there's no way out of my mess, I start to believe that I'll never meet somebody, and a family is something I don't even want to dream about...

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Hi there,


I totally understand!! Firstly I get flashbacks.. right now I'm having one.. I was fine for months and then suddenly (admittedly I did see my old "crush") things are bk to square one.. One thing I realised though is every relapse gets a bit easier to deal with and lasts less time...


As for meeting ppl.. who knows how it works? I do agree with darkpumpkin the world does work in mysterious ways, you meet ppl in the weirdest ways.. it is fate - or so we have to believe!!


Good luck! I hope good things are just round the corner.. I'm sure they are! Let's keep hoping!



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