How do skinny people stand out???

[tnttran]

when i was younger i was confident and outgoing and a normal weight, but recently i've gone through alot, and have become very skinny because i haven't been looking after myself... i'm 18 now

 

And now i've lost all my confidence, i hardly talk to anyone anymore. Some of my friends are all big and tough and even though i'm older than them, they treat me like a kid...

 

I don't having an eating disorder where i think i'm fat or anything, but i find it embarrassing to go out in public, unless i dress like a 14 year old...

 

I recently tried to buff myself up, i did research and found all the imformation i need. Except i'm reluctant to go to the gym, its the 2nd most important thing to being a healthy weight, but i can;t bring myself to go. I keep having this image of people laughing at that 14 year old skinny kid trying to be a tough man...

 

Everyone around me is bigger than me and i never see anyone skinny in australia... its intimidating, is this what its like to be skinny?

 

(sorry for some english mistakes )

[Jetta]

I think buffing up will help and most are too self involved to be noticing you at the gym. Maybe you just haven't hit your final growth spurt yet. I know my brother grew around age 20 to his final height of 6'3". You'll become a man in the physical soon enough, enjoy the fact you don't have to watch your weight like others do.

 

Was there a stressor that caused you to lose weight? Have you worked through that emotionally yet? What changed can you make that will help you be the man you want to be? Can you eat heartier meals for example? Maybe even try drinking protein shakes (they're good for muscle building) and high in calories.

[tnttran]

yea, i don't know if it was the chicken or the egg. but i became sad and withdrawn, i don't know why, i was suddenly scared about many things (the future, what people thinking about me, job, school, friends). And then i didint talk to people and lost many friends. I was VERY outgoing before, but now i;m completely opposite...

 

I just started feeling bad when i was growing up, i don't know why, and i don't like to tell anyone. Maybe i was sad because i was skinny? or being sad made me skinny... i don't know. My life seems ok, can't complain, oculd be worst. but theres always something missing and i;'ve never been very happy.

 

but my unhappiness lead me to this computer game "world of warcraft" it basically ate through my life. I didint eat i didint study. Fortunately my 1st years grades were high enough to make up for my failure 2nd year. I've recently quit, but still ifnd it hard not to tihnk about it.

 

Yea i know about all nutrition side of bulking up, i've been getting enough protein intake, except my calorie count is still abit low. but each time i go near i gym im shaking!!

[Jetta]

I think you need to meet with a counselor. Quitting school is a red flag. Something is going on with you, and you may have devle deeper to figure it out.

[tnttran]

oh sorry, i meaning i quit WoW.

 

wow got in the way of alot of things. I'm studing psychology in university now, to hopefully answer some questions and build ym confidence again...

[Bijoux]

I keep having this image of people laughing at that 14 year old skinny kid trying to be a tough man...

 

Everyone around me is bigger than me and i never see anyone skinny in australia... its intimidating, is this what its like to be skinny?

 

Listen, noone cares. Luckily you are not a public figure or the center of the universe. People is really too busy minding their own insecurities like for wasting more than 30 seconds minding yours. So what if they think for a second that you are 14? It's not gonna kill you, get over it.

 

Life it's intimidating itself. All of us have insecurities. If it's not too skinny, it's too fat, too short, too tall, too much of a virgin, too old, too young, too inexperienced, too many pimples... Is not about your looks, is about the attitude you have towards difficulties in life. Those are not going away. But all those silly demons in your head can go for sure when you decide to pop 'em off.

[sddeaston]

Man, no one pays attention to other people at the gym. If they are looking at you and making fun of you, they are insecure themselves....just go do it and you will start to feel better.

 

Nevermind the idiots.

[sddeaston]

Listen, noone cares. Luckily you are not a public figure or the center of the universe. People is really too busy minding their own insecurities like for wasting more than 30 seconds minding yours. So what if they think for a second that you are 14? It's not gonna kill you, get over it.

 

Life it's intimidating itself. All of us have insecurities. If it's not too skinny, it's too fat, too short, too tall, too much of a virgin, too old, too young, too inexperienced, too many pimples... Is not about your looks, is about the attitude you have towards difficulties in life. Those are not going away. But all those silly demons in your head can go for sure when you decide to pop 'em off.

 

Good Post!

[veneratio]

I know what you mean about being small or little and looking like a 14 year old. All of that used to bug me a lot too, but I realized that my being small/little and looking younger than everyone my age isn't going to go away and I have to deal with it somehow. So, I started making jokes. Before I'd get defensive when someone would bring it or I wouldn't say anything, but now I just make a joke out of it and get everyone to laugh. Eventually they stopped making fun, or making comments about it. And I'm still a short skinny kid, but my attitude changed.

 

I know it isn't an easy thing to do, changing your attitude. It's not going to happen overnight. It took me most of high school to get over my insecurities. But if you work on it, it'll happen. But like Bijoux pointed out, there's always going to be something about us that someone can say something about, it's just how you deal with it. Like even though my attitude has changed, there's always someone who will say something like, "man kid, how are you ever gonna carry that ladder/hose" and I just reply with a joke or "man, how are you gonna get through that small opening" or something like that.

 

Anyway, going to the gym will definitely help with your confidence. It helps me. My first time going to the gym, I got a little weird too. So I started bringing my ipod, it took my mind off of any paranoia I had. Something like that might work. Hope I helped.

[lifestream]

Listen, noone cares. Luckily you are not a public figure or the center of the universe. People is really too busy minding their own insecurities like for wasting more than 30 seconds minding yours. So what if they think for a second that you are 14? It's not gonna kill you, get over it.

 

Life it's intimidating itself. All of us have insecurities. If it's not too skinny, it's too fat, too short, too tall, too much of a virgin, too old, too young, too inexperienced, too many pimples... Is not about your looks, is about the attitude you have towards difficulties in life. Those are not going away. But all those silly demons in your head can go for sure when you decide to pop 'em off.

 

Blunt, yet effective!

 

I remember when I graduated from high school I had anxiety about my height and my looks. I'm very unique, you'd be able to tell me from another person almost any day of the week.

 

But I remember as I walked up to receive my diploma, although I was great friends with only a select few (and acquainted with almost everyone else), I had the loudest cheer of all my friends.

 

The point here is, I had this insecurity that I was being judged the whole time, when people actually thought I was a pretty cool person! So just think of it instead of someone sizing you up, instead as people falling in love with how awesome you are

[now_better]

hey fellow WoW player. i think wow is comparable to any addiction in life like gambling or drinking and grats for kicking it. the wow diet is a very easy, quick way to lose weight if you don't take care of yourself as often times you forget to eat.

 

about working out... there's really no time better to start than the present. i've been skinny my entire life since i was like 6 and it's nice that everybody i meet and all my relatives need to reinforce this to me "you're so skinny!". thanks, i almost forgot from last week when you called me skinny. really, the only person who can make a change is you. i'm tall so that makes me look even skinnier. i was 6' 135" (supermodel weight) like in june 06. i've worked hard at eating a LOT more and working out and i've managed to get to 150. i would like to get to 170 someday, but how much you gain and what you gain (you want muscle, not fat) is highly dependent on how determined you are. my relatives look at me now (like when i saw one on saturday) and say "gee, you've gained some weight, you look pretty handsome now" which is additional motivation to eat more (haha, this is hard) and work out harder. now i've kind of slacked off in the last couple of months, but working out hard in the gym (and doing it with good form) and eating healthy (lots of proteins, every couple of hours) will provide quick results in a few months. so like i said before... no time better than today.

[Mrs Elliott Smith]

If you're not comfortable going to a gym, why not buy some of your own weight machines and stuff and do it in your house?

[tnttran]

thank you guys so much for you advice, all of you!

 

I also heard from my brother the gym no one notice you, and its better to bring a friend! as i'm just moving into university, i've yet to have friends but i will make some and go to a gym. thank you i will perk up some courage to go by myself first... ; )

 

buying my own weight is great idea! i have money, but as i;m asian we houses are very small and have no room at all! however i will buy some dumb bells, which will fit ; )

 

Hehe, i knew someone here would also play wow, 1/75 people in the world play WoW. you are 100% correct about WoW thought... hehe.

 

i will be trying to improve my life now, and trying to help people here too! any tips on gianing weight plz tell me = )

[now_better]

1/75 is a bit high (that's 80 million people), i think you mean 1/750. here's what i did to gain weight:

 

a) eat every 3 hrs (6 meals a day)

b) lots of protein at each meal (protein shake, chicken, etc)

c) lift weights (bar dips, pull ups, bench presses, other compound exercises that workout multiple muscle groups). no machines, all free weights (builds your stabilizer muscles better). i actually bought this $100 book (totally overpriced) by Anthony Ellis, it's a good start if you have no idea on diet/exercise (like me)

d) persistence. you can't give up. i went 3x a week for like 3 months and a friend of mine said i was starting to look pretty built.

e) don't overwork your muscles, they won't have a chance to grow. you have to let them rest.

f) results might come slow. don't give up. fat -> lean muscle mass will slowly increase your weight.

g) supplements might help (protein powder, etc), but don't expect magic out of them.

 

i'm not sure about buying weights. if you find a good gym, you'll find everything you need. to buy all the equipment could be ridiculously expensive.