Ex just text'd me after 3 months.

[Benson]

For those of you that have been following my story here, I had a bad breakup with my ex, she left me for no reason, or atleast I didnt get any closure..

 

She messaged me yesterday and told me that she wanted her pictures back.

 

There are so many things I want to say to her, and im just looking for some advice..

 

 

Im not looking to get back with her, but I want to be angry at her, is this right?

 

I want to say what I couldnt think to say when it happened because I was too traumatized, is this a good idea? this would be when we meet face to face

 

 

I texted her back twice and said if you want them, you call me, dont message me on my phone again...

[hockeyboy]

what pictures is she talking about? are they something you think may be important to her or do you think she's using this as an excuse to contact you?

[Benson]

well they are of her childhood and stuff.. but they werent that important, ive had them for a year lol

 

even when i was with her i had them

 

but her message was very cold, "i want my pictures back"

 

 

I want to tell her what a selfish person she was and that I had earned more with her than to be let go at the drop of a hat, i want to tell her that i was Mod editing devastated cause she couldnt even give the decency of giving me a reason, or talking it out with me when every time ive had a problem with her I always talked it out with her, you know... i NEED to say thesse things.

[Siriana]

Send her the pictures.

Don't start playing ping pong with her - like if you want the pics call...etc. If she wanted to call or feel ready to call she would.

It is obvious she doesn't want to talk to you, because of that she sent a msg.

 

So by sending her the pics you'll gain control back.

Saying I don't want to send them makes you look worst than sending them to her without a word or a note. That is better and has stronger message.

[Benson]

really? even after what she did to me??

you wouldnt meet up and let her hear what you couldnt think of at the time to say??

ive been waiting to tell her this mod edit for a long time

 

 

she values silence too much. its time to let her see the real world

 

 

besides, who gets up at 530, getting ready for work and texes their ex of almost 3 months saying she wants her pics back... llol

[Siriana]

Hm, yes really - some people just live to hear they ex being pissed off.

I wouldn't even answer her msg. Than based on how angry I am I would choose to:

1. send them

2. not send them

And I'd stop answering her calls completely.

[annie24]

I'd send them back in a box, mail them to her, no note. it is her stuff, don't play games by withholding them, even if you are angry. just mail it back, no note.

[Ellie2006]

Hi Benson,

I agree with Annie and Syrix: simply mail her pictures back to her.

 

If she valued silence before, she probably values silence now.

Understandably, you have questions you want answered BUT I truly believe her answers, if she even gives you any, will not be satisfactory to you anyhow.

 

I think it'd be best to send them back and move on.

 

Just my two cents.

[Wandering_Sword]

I say send the pictures back in box without a note. It's obvious you're upset, but given the bluntness of her message and at the time of day she sent them, I don't think she would care if you were upset or happy. Maintain your dignity and just send the pics back without a fuss.

[Q-ball]

Anger only hurts you. Who cares about the damn pictures, who cares about her, she's obviously not a kind person, let alone someone you want to be with, seeing as how she texted you such a cold message like that after 3 months of NC. I she wants the pictures, tell her to come and get them. If she does just be civil to her, show her that you don't give a mod edit about what she thinks anymore. If she sees your angry still, she wins, she sees your happy, she get's curious as to why, or who is making you that way, and gets frustrated. If you want to get back at her for something this will bother her more. Plus, karma has a way of giving people what they deserve.

[Cindersam]

I TOTALLY understand you wanting to talk to her for closure. My ex dumped me over the phone after a 6 year relationship and I too would like to speak wtih him to get closure but as of yet it has not happened (it has been 3 months).

 

I agree with the others. Simply send her pictures back - no note. Be the mature one and you will keep your dignity and seft respect.

 

If she should happen to call you to thank you you can then ask to have a final conversation for closure. I suggest if you do talk to her don't be angry. She is not likely to be honest with you or even want to talk to you if you come at her angry and hostile (even though you may be feeling that way). Just talk to her in a metter of fact tone without showing much emotion. Why let her know how much she hurt you???? You DO deserve an answer and some closure. I hope you get it.

[Benson]

bah

 

well i already texted her saying that if she wants them to call me....

 

 

other than that i havent been rude/nice at this point,

 

i would send them back to her without a fuss, but she doesnt deserve that..

[Benson]

but what i wanna know is, why did she message me at 5:30 am, right when she gets up....

 

doesnt make sense..

 

"I've just gotten up for work, and I've decided I want my pictures back! im gonna text him!"

 

lol

[annie24]

you don't want to stoop to her level and put her through a fuss to get her stuff back. that will just make her angry and she will say to herself, "wow, I am so glad I broke up with that guy!" But if you take the high road, I think the ex will think to herself, "Maybe I made a mistake...."

 

I think you should go to the post office right now, and send them, no note, and don't bother texting her.

[Siriana]

Try not to think about that much.

Who knows why - maybe she's been thinking about asking them back for a few days and she knew she woan't have time to text on work so she decided to do it before going to work.

 

Send her the pics - no note!

[annie24]

yes, I agree, don't think about it so much. there are too many possibilities, not point in trying to figure it out. it is also possible she sent it last night, but the text didn't go through for several hours.

[Siriana]

yes, I agree, don't think about it so much. there are too many possibilities, not point in trying to figure it out. it is also possible she sent it last night, but the text didn't go through for several hours.

 

That could happen too! Happened to me many times.

[rosie76]

She's essentially asking a favour of you - returning something of hers that she didn't bother to take when she left. Seeing as she's done no favours to you in how she left, I think she's asking too much and, moreover, asking in a rude way. You've every right not to bother or ask for the respect of a phone call if she wants to ask a favour.

 

That said, will you actually feel better going off the handle with her? What if she's not sorry, doesn't care, reacts with scorn? I'm not one for keeping pride or looking strong if it goes against who you are, but what will you gain by saying what you want to say. Make sure you know what you want and are likely to get it before letting yourself in for the pain of talking to her.

 

Good luck.

[Benson]

thanks for the many replies you guys are great. certainly alot to think of.. I was considering just mailing the stuff back to her.. But it would also be nice to let her have it cause I never got the chance...

 

thanks again guys, I think if she calls im not gonna pick it up.... or...

lol

[Benson]

well she didnt have enough backbone to call me...

 

but i already knew that.. she might call me in a few days but im certainly not going to wait for her call...

 

hilarious, her status message on msn is ' {mod editing}ing {mod edit!}!!!!' hahahah i love it...

 

even though I dont quite know what I did.. LOL

[annie24]

Just go to the post office tomorrow and forget about her from now on..... and stop checking her MSN messages

[need2bme]

Dude, I know how you feel, really...

 

I thought I got closure and all it did was hurt me more. Of course, I will admit that I got some answers, but it still hurt.

 

Will you really feel better after the exchange? My ex wanted to stay friends, but how can I do that? That would be what she wants and still rip me a new one.

 

I know you want to fel better, but please don't meet her and give her any satisfaction.

[Benson]

I wont. Im going to tell her I dont have them anymore, and to have a nice life.

 

I can see if i was an {mod edit}, then fine.. I'd meet her, but when I did everything I could, still she couldnt give me common courtesy..

 

this chapter is closed, no pictures for her, nor am i going to reply to her.

[annie24]

I don't know what she did to you, or how mean she was to you, or if she cheated on you, but I think she should get her photos back. You know, don't stoop to her level and play a game. I do think that the mature thing to do is just to stick them in the mail and be done with it. In fact, I think you should have sent them back as soon as you two broke up. Photos are memories. if she left some DVDs or socks at your house, I would say forget it, she can go buy new ones at the store, but photos are not so easily replaceable.

 

I don't know.... I'm a believer in what comes around goes around. If you had a new gf and you guys wound up breaking up, wouldn't you want her to give back some photos or personal objects?