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True Love I need back HELP ME PLEASE


Blinking101
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Alright I been dating my girlfriend for 1 year. And well its been about 3 days since 1/5/07. And well I'll get down to it. She has asked me many times to change something about my self and that was I asked alot of questions. So she has given me 5 chances to stop asking questions. I would question everything she said. Also she didn't want to say some thing in fear of making me mad. Also I tried to force a few of her friends away. I know my mistakes and I am very sorry for the mistakes I made. We are only human you know. And since we broke up I have called and begged her to just give me another chance for me to go back and change the relationship to a whole new one. Make every problem fixed. I know I can do it. Also I have quit asking questions and she won't believe me nor will she give me another chance. Her parents told her that she needs to go back out with me because well I kept her out of trouble and I did. But right now she's heading into alot of trouble. This on kid is taking to her and all he does is want in her pants. I don't want to see her take the wrong road. So how do I win her back? The sex life was awesome. I was her first and she was mine. We would have sex like animals and I think that ruined alot because the relationship was not a Relationship it seemed more into a sex relationship. I have begged and begged for her to give me one last chance so I can make things right again. I am going to deliver her this letter I wrote to her last night. She is a very low middle class girl and I am a high middle class man. I am 19 she is 18. I would never use her for sex and I hope she wouldn't use me either. Also I gave her a promise ring too. She told me all the time she wanted to marry me. Also I accidently got her pregnant once and she had our miscarriage. I don't know how to win her back or should I just move on? Also I went up to her work place and I had a friend call and speak with her and she told me my girlfriend said "I don't care about him and I won't take him back" So how do a win her back or should I just give up now. And find another girl? I put up with alot with this girl. She was mean but when your in love you put up with anything.

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I think that first of all, you should leave the class references out...in terms of her being lower-middle class. If you have made frequent mention of this to her, it probably made her feel inferior to you. What does that have to do with anything?

 

Okay....and she has given you "5 chances" to stop asking questions. When 2 people are in love, they love each other and learn to live with the imperfections of their partners. You two are quite young, and perhaps you weren't right for each other. Or maybe you could both try it again when you are a few years older.

 

And remember this abovc everything else: the more you beg, the further you are going to push her away. If she has made up her mind that it is over, then you need to start planning how you are going to get through it. You are who you are and you aren't going to change overnight. Give yourself some time, and her some time to see if the problems will fix themselves.

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Its kinda ironic, what ends up working is moving on, even though you maybe faking it (and for the most part you will) take some time apart for awhile, let her get her bearings and you take care of your own issues in this time, then perhaps in a month give her a call just for coffee or something. I wouldnt do this unless you were absolutely sure at the end of 1month you've changed.

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Well here is an update you tell me what you think.

 

Yesturday she calls me and tells me to come over to talk. So when I got their we went to the park and talked. Also I spoke from the heart and answered anything she wanted me to know. And then me and her went to go pick mine and her friend named Andrew up. We stayed at his house and when he left his room to get something me and her kissed. Then we all decided to go to my friends lee's house to go jam out and so while they were playing guitar me and her were making out kissing, Touching, Saying I love you and everything. We were holding hands all night. I even gave her my hoodie to wear because it was raining and she did not want to get her hair wet. Then we took the kid home and me and her went back to the park. She sat their and she said. "I haven't taken you back yet. Just give me until Wensday. Don't call me or anything just wait till Wensday" And I was like ok I'll do that. And she's like Not leading you on I just got alot of things on my mind right now and I am not sure if I am ready for a relationship. And so then we sat and snuggled for awhile and so I took her home and she says "I love you" and she kissed me again.

 

Now I was talking to my friend lee and I did not even know this but Wensday is valentines day. And he is like dude she is going to take you back she is just setting you up to be ready for Valentines day. So it sounds like she is going to take me back and when I was with her last night I did not ask a single question that would annoy her. But does it sound like she's going to take me back on a romantic holiday? To me and my friends it sounds like that. So should I continue not to call her, and wait until wensday? What else.... Yeah me and her made out and kissed and everything. And she's like I love you and everything. So it sounds like she is going to take me back wensday. I totally did not know it was Valentines Day

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No you can win people back. If you truly love them. And know the situation. I've seen it done.

 

When people choose to be back with you that's just what they have done, made a decision to get back together. Nothing you do can make it happen. I am happy that you may have another shot with this young lady. Just make it count because love should never be neglected. Remember to stop with the "QUESTIONS" no matter what you ask her you cannot press a button and or say the magical word and make her stop doing something. My suggestions is take a look back and think abour how much you trust her. You sound very insecure.

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When people choose to be back with you that's just what they have done, made a decision to get back together. Nothing you do can make it happen. I am happy that you may have another shot with this young lady. Just make it count because love should never be neglected. Remember to stop with the "QUESTIONS" no matter what you ask her you cannot press a button and or say the magical word and make her stop doing something. My suggestions is take a look back and think abour how much you trust her. You sound very insecure.

I know. I will stop with the questions and trust her more. I believe she's going to give me another shot at this. Don't you believe that? I have taken your suggestions and thought about it a few days ago and yes I do trust her. Yes I know I come off sounding insecure but I do trust her. I was just cheated on before and that's where some of the 'Questions' come from.

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Ok wow my head is really spinning here, does any one else feel that?

 

My friend slow down and take a deep breathe..

 

This just doesnt sound right to me:

 

1 the questions thing, she shouldnt be threatening you that if you dont change its over. Love isnt like that.

 

2 You seem overly desperate to have this girl back, yet at the same time ur asking for advice if you should move on and find another girl...

 

I can understand the pain your in, believe me I do and so does everyone else here Im sure of it. I can tell from reading your posts, I can almost hear you saying them, as if your panicked, lost your breathe, total and utter desperation and I can tell you my friend that is no way to live.

 

Sure you are both young, that doesnt mean it cant work by all means, but telling you she wants to wait till wednesday, thats seems to me like shes playing with your emotions, almost like a control situation from my perspective.

 

Perhaps you should seek counselling yourself for issues you may feel you have If you think it might help "you".

 

I strongly believe that we should take each other for ourselves and if someone requests that we change in order to make the relationship work, If they are laying the blame on you, then I think there is something seriously wrong with the relationship.

 

You know in your heart what you want my friend, but ask yourself the hard hard questions...I can tell you, I just broke up with my b/f of 15 months only 3 weeks ago and part of me would die for him back, but the truth is when I sit down and ask all the hard and important questions I realise that as much as I love him, it just wasnt a good relationship to be in and I was "settling" and you should never do that.

 

I hope you find the answers deep within you, until then relax and take some deep deep breathes, they really help calm those anxiety blues that comes along with break ups..

 

( cant help but edit if i see a spelling error hehe )

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