Hayles Posted February 9, 2007 Share Posted February 9, 2007 Hi all! My name is Hayles and I'm 26. I have a gorgeous son, 4 years old. I have been dating BF far 3 years next week, he also has a son who lives interstate with his Mum (5 years old) and visits in school holidays. The thing is... 3 years on and there's nothing more than talk about commitment, no actual commitment happening. I mean, in the traditional sense of the word, yeah, sure, we're together - exclusively, we both apparently plan to stay together always.... However, we still don't even live together!!!! He lives in an apartment owned by his parents - rent free. It's barely big enough for him and his visits with his son. We live in a 3 bedroom rented house. Now, my BF refuses to compromise on this one... he refuses to rent when he can live rent free... fair call. However, his little plan is to build our first home together... and he has decided that we can not do this for at least another 2 years... I am growing increasingly impatient, how long does one wait to live together, to become engaged, to get some kind of commitment??? We talk comfortably about our future together, to him it's all just "it's not time just yet, we need to get money better sorted", to me it's "if you want something enough, you make it happen", and I feel that I would rather live in a ten shed and be woth him every night of my life than live apart for another 2-3 years so we can build a mansion... A friend suggested a nice compromise would be if we did get engaged now, begin slowly byuing bits and pieces, paying for things... so once it's time to get the finances sorted for the house, the wedding date can be set and is already paid for... make use of the time that we wait for a home... when I causually dropped ths idea into conversation all I got back was "If only it were all that easy", and as much as I usually control myself well, I didn't this time... I lost it, and I replied "And it's not all as bloody hard as you make it out to be either, this is something you should want to do now, if it was what you thought would make you happy - you would find a way. I am sick of all the talk, how long do you expect me to wait on words?" Maybe I am being selfish and he is right... but I don't think I am asking a lot... just for him to formally commit to something he says he wants... that should not be hard now, should it? Seriously guys... help me... how long should I wait for him?! Quote Link to comment
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