Her Ex (what do you make of this?)

[cblack21]

My girlfriend and I have been together for nine months at this point and early in our realtionship I was getting anonymous e-mails saying that she's going to cheat on me and that she's going to leave me. She was somewhat close with her most resent ex until this started going on and he started hitting on her big time and telling her screwed up stuff like "we're both going marry other people then we'll divorce and end up together". She cut contact with him but these e-mails continued so I finally sent an e-mail telling him that I know who he is, I sent a picture of myself and told him to get a good look at me because if he ever sees me in public he would be well advised to go the other way. I'm a pretty relaxed guy but I've got clear boundry's and once they're crossed I can be a real @$$hole. So anyway, that was in september, she and I went out over the weekend and it was the first time he and I were in the same place. When we walked in the door, he was sitting at a bar stool, immediately looked her in the eye and instead of looking me in the eye, he looked at my feet. The whole night, he would not look me in the eye. At one point, she went to the bathroom and while I was waiting for her, he went in the mens room. When she came out, I told her to wait because he was in there and I wanted her to see his behavior. He did the same thing, he gave her a sad look when he came out and then looked at my feet. What's up with the whole not being able to look me in the eye thing?

[finewhine]

Short answer: he's a creep. Creeps won't look you in the eyes.

 

The good news is, perhaps seeing you together will be the kick in the bum he needs to stop obsessing over her.

[chai714]

First, I would ignore those emails. Those are intended to get a reaction out of you. If you don't react, the anonymous party isn't getting any fulfillment.

[adahy]

Who knows?

 

Perhaps he didn't want to engage you, as you had threatened him. Either way, I often don't acknowledge people for various reasons (a loud guy or girl needing attention for example)...basically people I have no interest talking to. And, for the record, it is harder for the ex (without the girl) in those situations, especially if he's made an * * * * * of himself in the past. I would have left the bar altogether...not because I was scared, but simply because there were people I didn't want to be around.

[ghost69]

i have had the same situation. not emails though. you might want to find out how this guy got your email address. anyways, just this guy trying to call my girl all the time to talk to her. her ex. i was always there when he called too. finally i had her give me the phone and told him to stop calling or i was coming over. it stopped. then i saw him out and i yelled out at him to quit looking over. and he stopped. nothing since then.

the guy in your situation realizes that you are with her and can't look you in the eye cause he knows you are doing the girl he wants back. i probably would have left the bar too like the previous post. not intimidated at all, just to get away from the whole situation. plus, do you want your girl to look over at him and rekindle any feelings she has for the scumbag? just block this guy's emails and focus on your relationship. don't even talk about the guy anymore with her.

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[cblack21]

Like I said, after the e-mail telling him what's up, he stopped e-mailing me and contacting her. The situation was just extremely weird. He probably would have left except there was a band playing with a $15 cover.

[ghost69]

she cut contacts with this guy as you should. move past this. it sounds like he is done now.

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[cblack21]

I don't have contact with him, I just thought the behavior was odd.

[ghost69]

you said you were receiving emails and that you emailed him back

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[Iceman26]

He sounds like a weirdo. He was probably just trying to avoid conflict with you.

[cblack21]

She cut contact with him but these e-mails continued so I finally sent an e-mail telling him that I know who he is, I sent a picture of myself and told him to get a good look at me because if he ever sees me in public he would be well advised to go the other way. I'm a pretty relaxed guy but I've got clear boundry's and once they're crossed I can be a real @$$hole. So anyway, that was in september

 

It stopped in september. Once I replied to him, it all stopped. I was just commenting on his behavior upon finally seeing me in person.

[ghost69]

oh. well don't worry if it stopped. his behavior is intimidation. you scared him sounds like.

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