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Oookay.. I'll spill my dilemma!


A male friend of mine had a birthday party not too long ago where alcohol was involved.


[i don't drink at all]


He had already accumulated a buzz before I arrived, and when I did, he was really friendly and flirty with everyone. The time came to sing "Happy Birthday" and blow out the candles, but after that happened- because he was sooo drunk- he went around the room and kissed every single one of his friends. EVERY ONE of us on the lips. Cute, silly, funnnnnny antics!!


Later on, he kept telling me and two other friends of mine (and his) that he loved us and that we are very important to him. So-so minutes later, he took us into his bedroom to show us a DvD of QUEEN in concert. Again, I receieved at least 2 more kisses. During some songs, he sat between me and our friend, arms over our shoulders and swaying back and forth. He tried singing with Queen, so silly.


Then he told us he "had to piss", so he got up and headed towards his door, but! *I don't remember if I said something first* BUT, he said my name (or perhaps I said his name) and he kept winking at me.. At least 10 silly, drunken winks.. So what do I do? Play along and wink several times back and say "GO PEE".


He goes pee. He comes back into his bedroom.


I am laying on the extra mattress on the floor (meant for friends spending the night), and I outstretch my arms, wanting to give him a simple hug. He comes down and gives me a hug (so we're hugging upside down


He leans up, kisses me once.

Resumes the upside down hug.

He leans up again, kisses me again.

Resumes the upside down hug.

He leans up yet again, kisses me yet again.

Resumes the upside down hug.


3x he hugs and kisses me..




He is sitting on his bed, and I'm still on the floor mattress. Our two other friends at both sides of me with at least 1ft of distance. Next thing I know I hear "make out" from one of them.. What does the drunken birthday boy do?


He comes over and puts his tongue in my mouth for about 2 seconds. Our two friends are laughing hysterically and I'm in a semi-fetal position. Confused and laughing from shock. He goes back and sits on the bed and says "Oh gosh.. I can't believe I just did that." Then we're leaving the bedroom and someone says "do it again!!".. He tries to make out with me again, but I keep turning away saying "No no no, you're drunk *silly laugh*."


About an hour or so later, whenever I had to depart and head home, he kissed me at least three more times. Now he did kiss other people, mind you, but I was the one he kissed over 14 times.. And tongued!!




I jokingly brought it up when he was sober and we had a few laughs. Nothing is really awkward, but I feel so around him. I hide it and hide it well. I just don't know what to do because before this all happened, he would hug and sometimes pick me up/spin me around whenever we ran into eachother. Then again... With our group of friends, everyone hugs everyone.. So he picks up/spins and hugs all of his friends. Again, everyone hugs all of their friends here.. *ie. I do too.


But he has declared having a crush on a girl. A girl who supposedly has mutual feelings- but he doesn't make a move because he told me he's trying to take it slow.. To create a meaningful and hopefully lasting relationship..


But I have heard, and really believe this quote;; "A drunken man's actions are a sober man's thoughts"



What do I do??

Should I bring it up??

Any hints??

Anything I should keep a lookout for??

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  • 3 weeks later...

I would love to but I'm too frightened that it'll drastically change the way he thinks of me..


Leading to the end of our friendship because I think more of him than he does of me..


Perhaps I'll focus on gathering information first and forming my own conclusion- then possibly asking him some way..


Oh deary me.

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I would approach him when U 2 are alone and bring up a gay related subject and get his view on things. Bring up the time he kissed you, but first let him know that you are his frined and as such no matter what his answer you will repsect him, accept him for who he is and will keep the answer in the ut most strictess of confidentiality. Although his being drunk has a lot to show that this can be easily dissmissed it can also show that perhaps there is something more going on. And if he tells you he's not gay then let it be, could be he just isn't ready yet. Before I came out no matter how open minded some people where about being gay becasue I wasn't ready I always denied it, I was homophobic and thats how I was until I finally came out. If he is gay and ready to come out to you, he will, if he is gay and ISN'T ready to come out, just him knowing that you are an acepting person may put him at ease and in the big picture he will always be gratefull and will remember you!! Give it time, Be by his side!!

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There are several senarios in different situations.


If you two are together, maybe in his or your bedroom and you two hug (playfully), maybe you should go for it and give him a playful kiss and then hug him again like he did to you whn he was drunk.


If he is a true friend and likes it, he will return the kiss or will smile at you. If he does not like it, he will tell you so.


I don't think you have alot to be worried about. I have not seen that many straight guys that would kiss another guy more than once even when they are drunk.


One other situation you could try is this:


If he regurarly is in your bedroom, what you could do is write a note saying that how much you love him (something like you would write in a diary) and place it somewhere where he would notice it but not in full view. - maybe under your pillow but sticking out. He may be nosey and take a peek. Go to the toilet or something so that he can be alone in your room. That way you will notice if the note has been moved. If he still likes you, he will be smiling at you, if not, he will probably just walk out. I believe if he is still there after he has seen the note, then he is interested in you and you should should tell him in person that you love him or if the mood is right, move in for the kill. KISS him. I bet he will return.


Good Luck! Let me know what happens.

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It sounds to me like your friend is attracted to you on some level. It's absolutely true that drunk people act the way they think when they are sober- in many ways I think a person's true self comes out when they're drunk.


I would bring it up at some point. It's possible your friend isn't ready to admit that he likes you, or is afraid of being gay, so you have to be ready for it.


Or you could always try getting him drunk again and if it happens again then you have your proof.


BTW, how drunk was he? If he was just a little then this is very suspicious. If he was pretty sozzled then it's not quite as suspicious.

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