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He TEXTED the WRONG Girl - OOPS!!! -


CaliGirl77
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Okay, quick summary here - - - this guy (he lives 15 minutes away from me) and I have gone on a couple dates and snowboarding, we had FUN, no questions asked. We are not exclusive, just dating, but here's where it gets interesting........

 

The day after snowboarding, he sends me a text message and it says, "U R only 45 minutes to an hour from me, maybe I can come see you this week? Hangout or Dinner?"

 

Of course, I HAD to reply with, " What?"

 

His reply was that he meant for that text to go to his sister and she moved again and is having major drama and he had so much fun with me yesterday.

 

Okay, I was annoyed. I know it is none of my business, but he just made it my business by accidentally sending me that text, and I am no idiot. One thing I cannot stand is for soemone to lie to me and then throw salt into the wound by TRYING to insult my intelligence.

 

I replied with, "I had a great time yesterday, thank you. Please do not contact me anymore."

 

And he replies with , "Huh?" - - no response from me, and then he sends another text that says, "what are you talkin about?".........and he finishes it with, "If thats what you want. Bye"

 

No call, nothing, only impersonal text messages made up of a big lie. I am sorry, but I need to vent to whoever will listen. This sucks. He seemed so great and I feel like he messed up by accidentally letting me know he is dating around (again, not my business, but that accident was a bad one and it ruined our good time), and then he REALLY MESSED UP by lying to me. His sister?, please! I felt like asking if he usually asks his sister out on dates!!!????

 

Was I wrong?? Was I outta line????

 

What shall I do now??? He works with me and has to come in my office to sign paperwork!!! How do I act? What do I say?????

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Cali....you just be completely cold and businesslike...no idle chitchat.He'll get the clue. Besides..if he was THAT innocent, he would have made MORE of an effort to prove it to you, than just saying .."ok bye"............

Ugh....give me his number and I'll text him something REALLY nice!!!! LOL

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One more thing, that line he used ....."Hangout or dinner?" He used that on me, so I know it wasn't for his sister!! Besides, he told me he never sees his sister!!!

 

HE GOT BUSTED!!!!!! ..........now what???? I work with him!!!

 

 

It could have been a really good friend, i'm just sayin this because I know alot of guy friends who use that line as well and ti doesnt always mean a "date".

Besides, it isn't like yall have a long drawn out relationship and everything, be civilized work colleagues you're both obviously mature adults act like that way in the work place.

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He may have just wanted to protect your feelings.

 

Why not just tell him that you know that you two are not yet exclusive and you understand that he may be dating other people.

 

Then tell him that "dinner" will be fine, since he felt he couldn't talk to you and you guys will see where it goes from there.

 

If you no longer want to see him, then just act as if nothing happened, when you two are at work together.

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Cali....you just be completely cold and businesslike...no idle chitchat.He'll get the clue. Besides..if he was THAT innocent, he would have made MORE of an effort to prove it to you, than just saying .."ok bye"............

Ugh....give me his number and I'll text him something REALLY nice!!!! LOL

 

I agree with you Lady........we will see. He was supposed to come in on Monday, but never did. I think he is waiting for me to calm down, or he is a chicken. Either way, I will TRY my hardest to not throw my stapler at him. This whole thing seems so ridiculous! My dating adventures continue.........

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Yeah...tha non-exclusivity mixed with sleeping together never sat right with me...I get too attached emotionally. I once dated someone and slept over...in the morning before he awoke someone was pounding on his door and I heard a female voice yell some expletives beginning with eff and ending with YOU!!!...I felt so weird. It's one thing to kinda know that you arent the only one...it's another to be sure you aren't. I decided to only date one person at a time after that. I personally can't deal. Everyone is different though.

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I just want to clarify with everyone real quick. I wasn't attached to him emotionally. I knew we were not exclusive, thereforeeee FREE to date whomever. I considered him a friend who I had a so much fun hanging out with and obviously we had a very strong sexual attraction for one another and ended up in bed. I do not own him and visa versa.........so here's what makes me MAD..... The dumb, stupid lie = he thinks I am dumb = MAD CaliGirl.

 

Sorry, but I needed to clarify.

 

Thank you for everyone's insights. I greatly appreciate it very much!!!!

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Are you sure it was just the lie? It wasn't that big a lie (if it was a lie at all) and it could have been said to spare your feelings or be cause he was embarrassed and it was the first thing he thought of to say.

 

I just don't quite understand why you are so upset if you have no feelings for him and don't want exclusivity.

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Ssoo..if he would have just said...oops, I was sending a message to someone else...sorry ! Instead of claiming it was his supposed sister...you would have been perfectly alright with that?

 

Yes, very much so. Like I said, it's really not my business.

 

Then it would have been an "honest mistake" and we would still be hanging out.

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Are you sure it was just the lie? It wasn't that big a lie (if it was a lie at all) and it could have been said to spare your feelings or be cause he was embarrassed and it was the first thing he thought of to say.

 

I just don't quite understand why you are so upset if you have no feelings for him and don't want exclusivity.

 

I can only think of this.......I am the type of person who gets offended when people treat me like I am dumb - and people who are not honest with me. I guess it's too much to expect the same from others........

 

Oh, by the way, I didn't say I DIDN'T WANT to be exclusive, I UNDERSTOOD and acknowledged that we are not exclusive.......sorry if I didn't get that accross right.

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