After the impact...

[Ninako]

This is a post in regards to another that had shown a site that I recommend others check out:

(link removed)

I have already gotten myself out of a situation like this, and it is scarey to think that I had allowed myself to go through it for so long. I wish I had known about this sooner! I would have saved myself the trouble of 4.5 years! But in the end I DID learn some positve aspects. How to appreciate someone more, and how to appreciate being an independent person. I was lucky enough to get fed up enough and my friends stuck through it through the end and they welcomed me back with open arms.

 

But lately Ive started to notice the effect this has had on me. I was lucky to find a really great guy whom I can talk to about my past & he has helped me overcome alot of fears. But it still haunts me. I know I can trust him, but I sill have regressive thoughts that perhaps Im never going to be good enough, etc etc. Im worried that if I dont get over this soon enough, it make take a toll onthis new relationship, which is something I really wont want to happen.

 

My hunny tells me its ok, we're friends first & is glad I talk to him about it, but Im afraid too much is too much. Ive considered therapy but I dont really have the time or money for it. Honestly I'd rather come to this place, which I have seen has great responses n such. I guess Im just asking for someone to tlak to about this other than my hunny, or friends, or family, cause they've seen the whole deal, they know the effects but I know honestly theyre tired of hearin it. I would be too lol.

 

I mean, I've finnally put NC into effect. But in the end it seems Im just cutting off all the effort I PUT into that past relationship. It failed so I still feel like it was my fault, though I know better & I know it was his fault for the way he handled everything, Im at fault for not sticking up for myself in the long run & letting things happen for so long. Sry fer the long post. Just looking for support through this stuff-especially if anyone's been going through, has gone through, or may go through something similar, if not the same...

 

Ive already done whats needed, but its still hard to put one foot in front of the other & walk away from something I put so much effort into! lol.

[robowarrior]

Look , its out of your hands. Wether he wants to stay with you or not is his decision. He accepted you for who you are,and if he doesn't , bad luck for him. But if he does , then you have to accept that he accepts you. Stop hesitating and go for gold in your life.