fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 okay, this was my first relationship, and it lasted 1 year and 3 months. basically just over a week ago my life unravelled. my ex decided that were more like friends, that i'm never happy, and we should go on a break (not the 1st time this has happened). but this time communication just broke down. she wouldn't try to talk to talk to me and try and have fun with me like she used to. i went out on a friday night and got drunk with my/her best friend and he told me some things. apparently whatever happened she would break up with me in summer when we go to university, and that every other reason she had given has just been trying to justify herself. so the next day she asked if i would see her. i went to town with her to get something for her mothers birthday, which was that day. i ended up going back to her house and she and her family asked me to stay and eat with them (something i hadnt really done before, long story). and it felt good, and she even kissed me a couple of times when she had barely come near me at school in the days leading up to this. the day after that she called me. she seemed to just want to see how i was at first but then she kept saying she was bored, hinting that she wanted to hang out. so i invited her over, and we did and said very little, i asked her what she wanted to do and she just said "don't know" and stuff. after that all week at school it was awkward and she wouldnt talk to me or make an effort (when she said she wanted to fix this and she loved me when the break was decided. so yesterday i got sick of this and i initiated the break up and she agreed. last night was horrible cuz i am still in love with her and i knew she was hanging out with this guy who has been trying to break us up for 6 months and hates me. according to our mutual best friend, she won't go out with him. Tonight all my friends from school are at this school party that i couldnt get in to and i'm afraid shes gonna get drunk and do something stupid. i have to spend the next 6 months being miserable because she won't leave m friends alone (and they are my friends). and on top of all this i think i want her back. i dont know what to do. Link to comment
robowarrior Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 You shouldn't have initiated a break up if you want to be with her, you should solve the internal problems that you two have together, if she is constantly bored, you two should do fun things, you shouldn't be quiet, that's no fun. Imagine a person just staring at you without saying anything =\ , or in other words no action = no reaction. So make sure you invest some efforts, call her and say that you want to come back on the whole breakup thing you initiated, if that's too risky just call her and ask her if she wants to hang out, and keep doing that. Make things fun,exciting and interesting, and make sure that it isn't one sided love, if she's not been making any effort in the relationship in the past then i wouldn't go thru all of this again, and find myself another girl. Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Author Share Posted January 20, 2007 yeah, but i pretty much ended it cuz i thought she would but didnt have the courage to just do it. i was working on the principle that if you love someone, let them go and they'll come back. Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 no offense but thats kinda wrong on her side for hanging out with your friends and shes even been getting drunk with them and you're not not aloud to the party? how dumb is that, no offense but she seems like shes being a "s...." to me, thats just wrong to break up with a girl and her go to your friends for satisfying or w/e... Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Author Share Posted January 20, 2007 i was allowed to party, sorry probably wasnt clear. she used to dislike partying but seems to have changed her mind. Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 my bad, well what all did she do at the party then? Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Author Share Posted January 20, 2007 dude it hasnt happened yet. Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 oh lol, sorry, well u say shes hanging out with your friends? Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Author Share Posted January 20, 2007 yep, tonight and shes been with my best friend most of today. Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 wow..... thats stupid... you can do better then her trust me if shes got the nerve to hang out with YOUR friends and shes even going somewhere tonight with one of them, thats just kinda sleezy, but honestly, i would ditch her thats just wrong to do to someone shes either trying to make you jealous, or shes just wanting to piss you off or maybe she just wanted something better, but if it's that third one, choosing one of your friends as a new b/f if thats what shes doing, thats just wrong, i mean, still be friends with your crew but some girls ar like that and it's just wrong i would say alot more,but enot alone wouldn't like it to much lol, but i mean its hard to get over her but try and get someone better you can do it, and if your friends are gunna choose her over you, they aint true friends Link to comment
Joneysnai Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 she doesn't sound like she knows what she wants so i am for you on breaking up with her. she seems wishy washy, at school she isn't effectionate towards u but in front of her parents (what i am assuming) she is? it just doesn't add up to someone who REALLY likes you. if she did she wouldn't agree so easily to break up. now u say there is a party u can't get into and ur worried she might get drunk and do something different. i know u still have feelings for her but don't get caught up on thinking about what SHE is doing. remember, she is your x now and i doubt she will be going to this party alone, i am SURE if she got drunk, she will have friends to take care of her. on her hanging out with your friends and so forth, not much u can do there. it's your friends' decision whether to hang out with her or not and if something were to happen there, they weren't really your friends to begin with if u know what i mean. also there is another guy in the story that has been trying to break u guys up right? look at all these issues already (however small they may be) they are still issues. when in a relationship, it takes two to make it work, not just one person. u shouldn't have to initiate everything. she complains she is bored yet she doesn't know what she wants to do? interesting.. don't beat yourself up too much, i honestly don't think it woulda worked if u guys stayed together. Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 ^^^^^^^ shes right go out tonight with a friend and do something don't just sit at home wondering what shes gunna be doing, she really doesn't know what the heck she wants... Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 20, 2007 Author Share Posted January 20, 2007 i'd like to point out that the friend shes going with tonight has been very supportive of me and wont let her do anything stupid. and he will not go out with her for my sake. she just seems to be trying to cut me out of my own life. and im out tonight with an old friend Link to comment
Diablo7000 Posted January 20, 2007 Share Posted January 20, 2007 and thats probably what shes trying to do, don't worry about her, let her do what she wants, if your friends are any kinda friends at all they won't do anything with her to make you upset, Link to comment
fourmonthsatsea Posted January 21, 2007 Author Share Posted January 21, 2007 okay... i want her back. but i think shes well and truly had enough, apparently she just wants to be friends. ive never felt more alone in my life. i don't know what to do. Link to comment
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