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Signs she is not interested?


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so there's a cute girls that goes to my college, I don't see her that often but when I do I try to make conversation. I guess it is pretty obvious she isn't interested since she'll barely look at me when we're talking, and if I don't keep asking her questions or making comments she won't say anything. She isn't shy in fact she is pretty outgoing compared to most. This has happened to me when talking to virtually all girls. I'm a lot less shy than I used to be and I don't think that it is my confidence level; I'll make eye contact and try to keep my tone/manerisms casual and relaxed. It is starting to eat away at my willingness to keep trying (with any girls), though since these first real attempts to talk to girls so far have yielded no progress. I keep saying to myself that I have something to offer, but I've never had a girl interested in me enough to seek me out herself at all or engage ME in conversation when we see each other; I see the same girls relate to other guys more easily and it gives me the impression that it is either my looks or lack of popularity (people may call me a loner because I have a narrow circle of friends).


I don't know if it is me who is doing something wrong, though I'm no good at flirting, I don't think I'm the kind of guy girls are physically attracted to enough for them to welcome me flirting. I mean I know looks aren't always #1 priority, but I've always assumed from my own observations that girls will likely only welcome flirting if she is physically attracted to a guy. Because that is what I'm thinking from my own experiences as well. Or is it that I can't just talk to a girl when first meeting if I'm interested and I have to flirt all the time? This girl and I barely know each other, so whenever I see her I just like to small talk, though like I said, she doesn't appear interested.

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To me, an absense of signs that she is interested suggests she's not interested. So to detect a lack of interest, it's not so much signs, as a lack of signs. Unless she really loaths you or something. Then negative signs can become evident.


Normally, an uninterested woman just give no signs that she knows you exist at all, IMO.


However, you can change that. It's up to you to catch her interest. A nice friendly smile, eye contact, showing interest in her, or her well being, and humor all all ways to catch her interest that have nothing to do with your looks. I think those are more important than looks. However, looks can help too, but it's your personality that makes you or breaks you. You need to interact with her.


I only care about my looks to the extent that I can be reasonably assured they aren't holding me back as a negative. The positves are from my personality. Some like me, some don't. That's life. But you must try and put forth some effort and personality to even to get the "some".


I just heard of a survey where women were interviewed and the vast majority said a man's conversation abilities are the most important thing. One question was if given a choice between a man who's a good conversationalist vs good in bed, which guy would they choose? 85% of the women interviewed chose good conversation over good sex. I just heard about survey on the radio a few days ago.


A man's conversation skills are more important than how he looks, or is in bed. Part of good conversation skills is humor, among other things.

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Not that I doubt what you heard, but somehow it is hard for me to believe those results. I still see girls hanging with guys who may be funny, but are immature and more about flirting and playing games than actually talking. From what I've witnessed I see more girls reacting to guys who act crazy and are "life of the party" type and less to a guy like me trying to talk to them and show his intelligence and maturity. I find it hard to be funny with people I don't know well. Especially with girls, they never appear enthusiastic enough when talking to me for me to use humor anyway. I guess it would make more sense if a girl gave an example of a conversation she had with a guy that got her interested in him.

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You know whats a great sign...ask for her phone number and see how she gives it to you. If she says no, she isnt interested. If she is excited and gives it to you with no hesitation, she is interested. Anything else means she has no or little interest in you.


Women like men with confidence. Part of that confidence is having the confidence in asking for what you want.

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I see more girls reacting to guys who act crazy and are "life of the party" type and less to a guy like me trying to talk to them and show his intelligence and maturity


Each time I have been out at a bar and displayed any frat boy antics I am practically a magnet for women, and not all of them are drunk. Somehow they see my pompous and obnoxious behavior as fun, and most of them are hot. There is a thread "How to meet guys in college" which talks about some of this stuff. If your younger, then this is what people do, and this is what many people are attracted to. As you get older, "life of the party" is annoying.


Signs she interested:


1. Looks at you

2. Touches you

3. Positions herself towards you

4. Plays with her hair

5. Laughs at everything you say

6. Tries to get your attention with an emphasized "Hey"

7. Smiles

8. The list goes on. Generally, any sort of "interest" (for lack of a better word) in you, your comments, etc., is generally a sign of interest.


Many of times if you see these things and you are not interested in the other person then you might think "S/he is acting pretty dumb or silly"


Not interested:


Generally the opposite of each of the above, plus

1. Unintentionally avoids you


Caveat: There are people that show signs of interest but are NOT interested in you romantically. They are just friendly, positive people towards others.

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