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Dumped out of the blue!?

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Ok I'll try and explain my situation... (sorry its soo long!)


We were vague friends, he became single and after a drunken night we became much more than that.


We had an awesome relationship- everything felt so right and fitted. We never argued and were living in each others pockets, felt adopted by his family- who I miss all of too. This bliss lasted for 6 months.... then


totally out of the blue he dumped me. I was still at uni and he had started a very hard job, he was living and working an hour away. But we had talked about how we would work around this.


His reasons made no sense to me, which certainly didn't help my broken heart. I'm much better than I was at the beginning (also 2 days b4 my birthday!) didnt/ couldnt sleep or eat for 2 days. So the reasons were something alng the lines of work and we are both busy, and the distance AND he insisted there was nobody else- no girl.


He wanted to do the friends thing though, which I agreed to as i couldn't believe this person who had changed my life beyond belief was jsut walking out- so I had to cling onto something.


Since then I managed a month and a half of NC, however, its quite tricky as we have many mutual friends and he is also a useful contact for getting into the job I want in the future. So now we are talking.


So also I know he has a new girl "sue". BUT i know now, that she is the reason he dumped me. To cut my already long story short I saw an email from Sue to my ex- which showed theyed had a big argument. It was clear he'd dumped me for her (she was worried teh same might happen to her) and that she thought he had been a liar for x y and z occasions. what she said about him mirrored so many of the letters I wrote and never sent- it was almost spooky. I get the impression they are out of their rocky patch now but... do I tell her that there are two occasions after he dumped me when he came to visit mutual friends and ended up in my bed! thereforeeee- he's cheated on her twice.


I'm angry at him now and as hes hurt me so much and lied to me so much I want him to have a taste of his own medicine- do I tell Sue the truth? Before he breaks her heart too?


BUT why oh why do I still want him and love him- because what we had was an amazing and I still dont fully understand why he made such a U turn?


I've even had fling with a few guys who were definatly physically more attractive than my ex to am avarage female opinion- but I couldnt see them like this and found every aspect of these flings unsatisfactory compared to my ex.


I need to find someone new, who is better than my ex, or get back with my ex OR I will go nuts. He plagues my mind and is messing up my degree!


Any opinions/ comments/ advice appreciated!



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Well... the little devious side of me says..tell the girl...however, it is not the most healthiest way to handle the situation ...so i vote to not tell her.


here's why... he doesn't sound like the best guy... he sounds like a little weasle actually and the best thing that you can do is remove yourself from his life and be grateful that he lives so far away. He's his new girls problem now...and based on the email you saw...she knew he was dating you when she got with him ......so let her figure out on her own what kind a person he is.


As far as your degree.. make THAT your priority ..that is something that you can rely on in the future ....and trust me on that one!

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A part of me says tell her, let her know that he's a serial cheater. This guy is bad news, what if he marries her and still cheats.


A different part of me says just keep up the NC, don't let him in your bed ever again. This guy sounds like a real turd and needs to be cut out of your life. If he tries to have sex with you again, DO NOT SLEEP WITH HIM!

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