TV - The third person in a relationship

[Night Pumpkin]

Many people become so emotionally attached to a television that in a way they commit infidelity. The average American adult (and most adults in all countries of the Western world) spend an average of 25 hours per week watching television. Just imagine if all that time was used for something productive in a relationship, such as an extra date night, time making out, and most importantly time communicating.

 

In many ways, a television (or a computer) can become a third person in a relationship, stealing the time, attention, and emotional attachment that should belong to another human being. One of my friends has decided to not have a television for that reason. He and his wife decided that a television would draw them away from each other, so they have banned television in thier house. This seems like a reasonable idea, and I would also like to ban television in my house so that it doesn't draw me away from the time and attention I should be giving my future wife.

[Cassie]

Very noble and interesting. Have you considered setting aside time where you and her could watch a few hours of television together a week?

 

I rarely watch television myself. Most of the programs are complete crap. I spend the bulk of my time reading nowadays.

[sweetheart21]

That sounds like a nice idea. But I know I would go crazy if I spent all my time with my partner. Sometimes its nice to sit and relax for a little while.

[BellaDonna]

I think it all depends on how the TV is being used. I love watching TV with my husband. It's relaxing and fun to park on the couch together and be brainless for a little while and be shocked, amused, and/or laugh at distasteful humor. It's not something we do all that often but I would say that it is quality time. We don't fight over the remote so I suppose that helps....

 

I have seen instances where TV and computers have ruined relationships. In most of those cases, it's ONE partner deciding to make the TV top priority while the other does not agree. I things get really problematic when a partner expects the world to stop turning when they are on the computer or watching TV: meaning that they will not leave the house, they don't want to be spoken to by their partner, or they neglect daily responsibilities. It then becomes oppressive.

[J6hn]

Personally I don't watch TV at all.

My girlfriend has cable, so she does a fair bit.

It's great sitting back and relaxing watching it with her, the only annoying thing is when she calls me up when she feels like talking but ends up watching TV and ignoring me somewhat, laughing at the TV, appologising for ignoring me then going straight back to watching the TV.

[Iceman26]

I don't watch much TV either. I am a big movie and book fan.

 

However, if my wife wants to watch one of her TV shows, I will watch it with her.

[quietgrl]

I know i'm a TV and computer junky and Night Pumpkin your post is making a very good point.

[BeStrongBeHappy]

Too much TV can be an addiction like anything else... and sometimes it is used to avoid the fact that the couple has little in common or much to say to each other...

 

I don't think you have to go to the point of throwing the TV out, unless one or the other is so addicted to it, and they choose TV over interaction with family... but i do agree that lots of people's lives revolve around what show is on tonight, and spend the majority of their free time hooked on TV...

[rocio]

Lately I've become a t.v. junkie, but I don't mind because it fits in with my needs and goals at this point in time. Growing up, we never had a television. My mother got rid of it when I was 4. Other people probably thought we were freakishly weird, but I'm glad to have spent my time reading and building tree forts instead. My kid won't watch t.v. until she's 1.5 years old. And even then it will be very limited - both in duration and content.

 

Back to the question of relationships- I have to admit, I just love cuddling up in front of the t.v. for hours. But it can get in the way of communication. What bothers me the most is that my man refuses to eat at the table - he absolutely MUST eat his meals in front of the t.v. That bothers me because I feel like meals are a great opportunity for bonding and communication.

[Rabican]

are you going to ban the internet also?

 

Personally I dont spend much time watching the tube... way more time spent on the net & playing video games, but I dont think its excessive to the point that its messing up my relationship. (my girl would say otherwise during football season... but I disagree)