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My girlfriend gave me the "I need space" speech about a month ago and she has gotten colder every day since. We have dated for over 4 years and been close friends for about 6 years. We were each others first. We knew we would always be together. I respected her more than any other person I knew. Really! How many people can say that they got to be lovers, friends, and soulmates with the person they respected the most? I had the world in front of me. My dreamgirl, my dreamjob, health, everything.

What happened? She has lost a significant amount of weight in the past year and maybe she thinks it is time to trade up. It makes me so sad because we have stood together and supported and loved each other for so long. I started dating her when her inner beauty was more visible than her outer beauty. Friends and family would ask why I was with a girl that wasnt pretty enough for me. I saw the most beautiful girl in the world. LAK became my type. I started finding her physical features unbelievably attractive because how wonderful she was. She swears there is not anyone else and that we "might" get back togetherafter she has had some time. If I knew I could wait 1, 5, 10, or 20 years and get her back.... I would. I dont want to play the fool but I love her.

Even worse, I "laid it on the line" to her in a 5 page letter telling her my feelings honestly. This seems to have pushed her farther away. I am unsure how to talk to her since I have to hide my feelings and pretend my heart is not breaking. This all seems so selfish to me. Women wonder why there are so many dogs out there. The guys like me who dont want to play games and who are faithful, loving and honest get rewarded with contempt while those dogs have their day. I want LAK back but I dont want to play the fool. Please help.

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  • 1 month later...

im truly sorry. this has to be crushing for you. how old are you?


i dont know if she is going to come back around. if she does...it's going to take time. since you were each other's first...she may be wondering what else is out there. she might be having a wondering eye and want to try someone else. she will find out though either you were the one or you werent. she will either find someone else that more matches her or she will realize how great you were and want you back.


im sorry to say this but it will take some time. be patient. if it was meant to be then she will come back to you. but what she is going through is just part of young adulthood development. she needs to know if you truly are the one. this is something she has to do. it's like the movie A Perfect Storm with george clooney. she knows there's a hurricane out there and she knows it's dangerous and she knows she is possibly going to hurt everyone that gets involved...but she goes anyway.


good luck.



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