To love is To Let Go

[RegallyBlonde]

Last night I watched the Wedding Planner and unexpectedly in the middle of the movie I started crying when the main character (Jennifer Lopez) talked about how she was still hurt over her ex fiance cheating on her with his old high school sweetheart.

 

It's been over one year since I've been with my last boyfriend. He ended up getting back together with his ex girlfriend about two weeks after he broke up with me. It took me a long time to get over it and now I can look back and at least smile at the good memories we had.

 

Yet, when I watched that part of the movie it hit me so much that I realized I loved my ex. All this time I told people that I've never been in love and I think a part of the reason was because I didn't want to fall for someone so much only for them to end up leaving me, which he did. He didn't cheated on me, but for so long I felt betrayed since he most likely heard she was around when we were together and had doubts in his mind which led him to ending our relationship.

 

I've dated some, but it hasn't worked out. No one has yet to give the time and effort that he gave to me. I know that someday someone special will walk into my life and will want to experience a deeper side to love that I've never experienced, but for this time I can only compare the love that I've experienced to my relationship with him.

 

Today I saw on his MySpace picture section a couple of pictures of a trip we went on (I wasn't in them...they were just pictures of the scenery). He has tried to get in touch with me once after our NC. I sent him a short reply (that was all I could give him). I know he still wants to be friends, but I know at this time in my life I cannot.

 

You see, he is still with his girlfriend...they're actually engaged to be married (he contacted me right before he proposed to her) and he is also a father figure to her child, whom she had with another man.

 

Now I'm realizing more of what "to love is to let go" means and because of that I am not bitter like I used to be. I just want him to be happy...

[Blue Skittles]

I understand how you are feeling. It is hard to see an ex move on. But yet you are dealing with it in a healthy way. Thats good to see. I hope that you will find someone to be in love with, but that takes time. Be patient, and do things that are going to make yourself happy. Set goals for yourself, travel, go see the world, gain your independence. That way when u find someone you will have a world of adventures to share with him.

[herbal]

Now I'm realizing more of what "to love is to let go" means and because of that I am not bitter like I used to be. I just want him to be happy...

 

I know what you mean by that. I hated a certain girl when she left me for her first love mid last year until december when i broke NC and said hi,i know i dont hate her so much right now if at all i hate her, i think if she is happy wherever she is,good for her,i have move don with my life and hope ill forget about her sometime. We shared a special time,but am sure better will come.

we dont see each other often but i know that i dont feel so bad when i see her,i think i have healed.

Well i learned to let go-------------

""A man can only posses what is really real if he learns how to let go""

-------------- I read that somewhere!

[RegallyBlonde]

Thank you so much for both of your replies.

 

I wonder how common it is to leave another in order to go back to one's first love.

 

New love...

 

Old love...

 

I think at times it is difficult to know when to look back and when to look forward.

[herbal]

Hey dont beat yourself so much about it,you will get over him,and then you will be so happy you are free,then you can spread your wings nd explore new horizons