What to do? (A relationship dilemma)

[BitterSweetAngel]

I had been going out with my partner for almost two years. His mother doesn’t like me at all, so much in fact that she never txted her own son & even just coffee with him seemed to never happen. No one seems to know what I have done wrong (most parents usually want to adopt me!) But she hates me… Now we’ve broken up & now that I’m out of the picture she’s suddenly his new best friend & the whole family is suddenly happier. After talking with him we agree that we cant get back together until we solve this problem with his family. But I dnt know what to do… She scares me so much and I dnt know if talking to her would even help. What do you think???

[audreypoulain]

I am in the same situation. I met my guy's mother and she hates me too. In fact she refused to look me in the eye and found it an inconvenience to shake my hand! anyway we broke up and got back together under the pretense that he doesn't talk to his mom about me. I am okay with that I know it will take time for healing and besides the lady is in her 60s! she might forget about me anyway so I am not bothered about her hating me anymore. What I think you should do is just be his friend and slowly little by little he might tell his mom that you are a nice person and tell her all the good things you do. If you dont like that then just tell him to tell his mom you are out of the picture but to still remain friends. Eventually with time things are forgotten and things heal. Just appreciate him as a friend and his mom might forget and slowly learn about you in a new nice way. Remember you are going to be with him not his mom and if he loves you nothing should stand on his way. If a mom loves her son then she will want her son to be happy with the person that he loves. Unless his mom is a total b--tch then I dont know what you can do.

[LilyXX]

I have a similar problem. My mother does not like my bf, and the feeling is mutual. He tried to be nice and win her over before, but it never worked. As far as she is concered he is the wrong religion, has the wrong job, is too old. She just refuses to accept him. Now it is so bad that he will not go to family functions at all. He is very resentfull about the way she behaves.

 

I never got along with my mother myself, she is very manipulative and always trys to change other people. She constantly give unwanted advice. I only visit her when my sister is in town. We can't spend 20 minuted together without fighting. I do try to maintain a relationship with her, she is my mother after all.

 

On the plus side, his parents love me. But they hate their other daughter in low. I think this is just human nature to want a "star from the sky" for your child. Real people just don't measure up.

[BitterSweetAngel]

that was very helpful...

I just dnt think she can change thats all.

No one else seems to think so either.

When Im not around her and jayme have so much fun together.

I dnt want him to lose that again...

[sonjam]

His mother cannot be his life partner. You can. She can't keep him to herself forever, and that is probably her attetude. Tell me, did she also dislike his previousl g/f's?