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Ex need help with Aboration....!!

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Hi everyone,


For those who read my post before pretty much know my story.


link removed


I broke up with my girlfriend of 4 years about 4 months ago ......


We broke up because I treated her really bad and got her pregnant(twice).


Then she got back with her ex and last month she went back to see her bf and I havent got to see her for a month and yesterday, She came back home with me to check on hamsters that we have, talked for an hour and (I dont know how and why) we had sex. I noticed that something was wrong with her body and I asked her if she was pregnant, she told me she had her period so I believed her.


Now, when she went back to visit her bf, they had sex of course, but

even tho they used condom, she still got pregnant from him. ( I found this out from her 5 hours after we had sex and coz she doesnt want to tell anybody(including me))


First I was at shock with her being pregnant because I am a guy that is very very sensitive with the sexual relation ship with the person I like and love. I treated her bad mostly because of her pass sexual history with other guys. I dont know why I am somehow being okay with this and still want to get back with her. I just want to start fresh over with her.


Recently I found out that what I did to her during the the four years was truly TOTALLY WRONG and I indeed treated really bad. I was stupid, ignoriant, foolish, childlish, pushy, I cant believe I have done what I did. After I found out how stupid I was, I feel really really guilty and sad.


Today, before I took her the doctors for the aboration, I dont know how and why we had sex again right before the aboration. I guess I started but somehow she was okay with it even tho she knows we cant do this before an aboration is performed.


Now, I just want to take care of her, forget what we did in the past and have a fresh start but something tells me this can never happen.


Can anyone tell me why I feel like this? I should hate her for what she did, I should leave her because she got pregnant with another man, I am suppse to be very sensitive about this issues, why am I being okay with this ? Why I can accecpt it ? Why do I still want to be with her ?


I feel very confuse about myself, I dont know what I want anymore.........


I feel like I am at the edge of a mountain and about to fall.............

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Seem likes the both of you really screwed up a lot in the past. Apparently you still have feelings for her even though she was with another guy which happens. I know this is harsh but, it should be better that you get over her and quickly. It seems like everytime your together you end up having sex and not that it's always a bad thing but her getting pregrant when she's not ready is a real serious issue. Abortion is not something that should be taken so lightly. Next of all even though you say you feel guilty you don't care enough to stop yourself. It's not to say your not guilty but, you can't stop yourself. Seriously you need to maybe talk about what you did to her and see how she really feels about all of this. If she doesn't want to talk stay away from her. After talking it through you should take some time out and don't start dating somone get to know yourself for a while. If this doesn't bother you as much as you think it should something is probably wrong. Maybe you care about her but when you love somone you learn to care about what's best for them and what effects that person. I hope this all works out sorry this sounded rather negative. Best Wishes

The Samurai Monkey ^_^

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I agree with Samurai......first of all, WHY DIDN'T YOU USE PROTECTION? If I read that right, it means you got her pregnant twice, possibly three times.....if you can't have sex responsibly then don't have it at all. Abortion's not birth control and every time she has one, it causes more scarring to her uterus which could eventually lead to her not having children.


Secondly, you're being selfish in the fact that you're basically using her emotions and her body when it suits you, and being angry at her when it doesn't. Grow up and let her go. Both of you need to step away from each other since it seems that neither of you can handle this relationship in any kind of mature or responsible way. Sorry to sound harsh, but that's how I see it, right or wrong.

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