confussed and feelign messed up!

[stoneage]

We do almost everything

That lovers do

And that why's it's hard

Just to be friends with you

And everytime your heart is broken

By the fool I want you to know

That it hurts me too

It's hard to wipe your tears away

Knowing you should be with me, tell me

 

Chorus:

Why, why are we still friends

When everything says

We should be more than what we are

And tell me why

Everytime I find someone that I like

We always end up being just friends

 

Verse 2

 

I would hate for you to find somebody new

Who you really love

Cause it could mean losing you

But am I a fool girl not to say

If I'm always scared I'll lose you anyway

Somehow someway I've got to choose

Got to choose no matter if it's win or lose

 

(repeat chorus)

 

Bridge:

 

I don't want to be like your brother

I don't want to be your best friend

I only want to be your lover

When will this end?

If I told you that I want to be in your life?

If you could be the woman in mine

 

 

this song is exactly what i'm going through right now!

 

we currently live together in a 2 room apartments, both of us have our own room. we cook together, we do groceries together, watch movie almost every night together. and we have same interest! and her parents & grandparents are in favor of me living with her.

 

how many couples out there can almost only dreaming about all of the above.

 

i really dont know what to do about this...... its sad that we cant be together. reason #1 or rather the main reason is because she's a strong Christian and i'm not a christian. the other reason is we dont have any romance ! how can we increased romance between us? i will really appreciate it if anyone can tell me what to do!

[honeyspur]

You must open up and become more curious.

If she is a Christian and devotely so, you must begin to show interest in her religion.

Showing interest does not make you a Christian. But it shows you have interest in her and knowing her deeply. Her connection with God is a very deep part of her, affecting her personality. So if you like her, then her belief in God must be a plus.

Going to church with her may be exciting. You can remain agnostic and still express your curiosity.

This may bring up some very interesting discussions. As long as you aren't trying to prove God doesn't exist, things should go smoothly.

 

In Christianity, it is a "rule" so to speak, that you not get involved with someone who isn't a Christian. Not everyone follows this rule since it is open to perception. Getting to know her religious side may also clear up any doubts you may have as you get to know her - perhaps her rules and needs will not match yours and you will be able to release any feelings of romance by choice.

[stoneage]

thxs for the respond! totally appreciate it. i do follow her to church, and followed her to some church camp. i've got nth against christianity, i'm just not ready to accept any religion thats all. i dont want to be a hypocrite. other than going to church with her how else can i show interest without her suspecting anything?

[honeyspur]

Why on earth would you not want her to suspect anything?? That is exactly what you want.

Is this about fear? Because if it is - you can move through that.

If she's not interested - I suspect she will not want your friendship to change one bit. She will most likely want things to remain as they are - as you do I'm guessing, so work up some nerve and start showing more interest in her personal details.

If you've done all of this and you guys know each other inside and out - then the only left is to confess feelings.

Make it a casual setting, but take the gutsy way and say exactly what you told us.

You like her for all these reasons and you wondered if she was interested in you as more than a friend. You know this seems awkward - but you realized that anyway you went about it, it would be awkward.

 

That's a very safe, straightforward way to present it, that doesn't sound cliche' or fake.

Wait until she gives you an answer to assure her you don't mind being friends. This will show you have confidence and can bounce back from a rejection - which is what you will need to do if you want the friendship to remain.

 

Don't be afraid!! You won't ruin anything, I promise!! And if you deal with it and she says no - you can move on! Take the leap of faith stoneage.

[stoneage]

i've already confessed my feelings to her before, but i told her i'm not expecting her to be my gf as i'm not really her type of guy. i just told her my feelings to her.

[honeyspur]

Well then - my apologies - I did not realize.

This is a situation where you must move on then? I see now why you are feeling so bad.

A change of heart is something you need to do in order to give yourself peace. You have a good friend in her - and living together suits you.

My feeling is you have a wonderful relationship.

To accept you're not going to get together is best.

 

Making things more romantic only makes sense if she has not given you a clear answer on her feelings for you.

If she has left that up in the air, you could try being more assertive and leaving her little notes, taking care of extra housework (things she normally does) and buying flowers she likes, but just buying them for the house - decoration, so when she walks in, her favorite flowers are there. Just creating a nice atmosphere in the home based on little things she likes.

 

But like I said, I would only do this if she hasn't been clear to you already regarding her feelings.

My sympathies are with you - I understand why you are feeling down

[stoneage]

thank you so much for ya respond, is't normal for me to feel that she is kinda avoiding to fall in love with me. i just sometime have this feeling that its not she doesnt wanna be with me but she is afraid to be with me