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Advice for a fool?


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Hey everyone -


I feel somewhat stupid asking such a thing - I'm 24 and still don't know how to make the first move. All my life I've waited for women to come to me, as I am somewhat passive in that way. I have no problem talking to women, but I'm always apprehensive of making a move. I don't fear rejection, just the tension afterwards if I have to see that girl again...


So anyhow, this is the deal. I work nights at a large theme park, where they have a "night spot" with clubs and such. I get a call (I fix technical problems with the registers) to go out to one of these clubs, early afternoon, while they are booked for a private party. Anyhow, there is a beautiful woman bartending that I eventually broke the ice and started talking to. She was very nice, and even stood right next to me to talk (unlike the at-the-other-end-of-the-bar and I-don't-want-to-talk-to-you thing)


I'd really like to ask this girl to go out sometime, but it's kind of akward because:


1) We both work at the same company - and probably will be working when I'll see her next.

2) I'm such a novice at making the first move!

3) If it backfires, I'll have to see her again surely, and it'll be weird.

4) She works at a club. If I was going to, I should have asked her that day when there was no one around, instead I wimped out, and now how the heck can I ask her out with a club full of people?


Any advice for the fool who missed his chance?

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Hey I know this thing with women is really weird sometimes but go in early where she works and just ask her to go out with you. That way no one is around and if she does reject you then you will not feel as bad as if you would in front of everyone. I know I probably didnt help!! I would just go up and talk to her and then ask her out. The worst thing she could say is no and the way you talk I dont think she will.

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Wadup. Hey aahh this theme park you speak of, it wouldn't have anything to do with a citywalk would it ?? Just wondering. About the chick. I agree with coltons-mom. Just go when nobody's around and lay it down thick. But how long have you known her? You could play it cool, get to know her better before you make a move. If she says no, its still alright cuz at least she know how feel.

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I think you should say something like: "Would you like to go out sometime?" and if she says "yes", then have something all ready to do, "How about the movies Saturday?" or whatever day. And then pick a movie, chick flick...etc. Or you could just say, "Would you like to go see "(movie)" with me this Saturday?" If you are more uncomfortable about the work thing than going out with her, then don't ask. I always made it a rule that I wouldn't date anyone from work although in the past 20 years I broke that rule twice. It was a little uncomfortable but not devastating afterwards when there were no sparks. It sucks, but you're just going to have to take the plunge and put yourself out there. And always remember, you're not attracted to all women and all women aren't attracted to you. No big deal, you know? There's plenty of girls out there that think you're the bomb, I'm sure. If it does backfire, just be happy-go-lucky and chalk it up to having a learning experience in life.

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