Drinking Leads To Calling Him!!!!

[nins2]

ok i have a big problem. me and my ex have been broken up for 2 months now. i broke up with him and he tried soooo hard to get me back and i just kept saying no. there was too to many problems we couldnt deal with and trust issues on both parts. So i decided to visit my friend in new york for the holidays to get away from everything. obviously we have been going out to clubs and parties and all that since everyone's on holidays. the problem is i have called him 4 times in the past week. its almost as if i feel the need to talk to him everytime i drink!!!! otherwise, im fine like i dont wanna talk to him when im sober because i know its over. i dont understand why i cant just go out and have a good time in an amazing city without feeling the need to call him. worst part is that i called him last night at 3 am and i had a 16 minute conversation with him and i dont even remember what i said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELP ME IM SUPPOSED TO BE GETTING AWAY FROM MY LIFE being with HIM. im ON VACATION!!!! how can i solve this problem?!?!?!?! should i stop drinking? how can i stop my self from calling him when im out?

[Iceman26]

So basically you are a drunk dialer.

 

Why not leave your phone with a friend so you won't be tempted to call this guy at 3 AM, or, control your drinking so you won't have these impulses.

[shelly7]

Never drink when you're going through a break up! And yes I agree with the above poster if you're going to drink give your phone to your friend.

[nins2]

i do leave my phone with my friend but that doesnt stop me from using someone else's phone to call him lol

i just need to make sure i control my drinking

[timlondon]

Never drink when you're going through a break up!

 

Is this possible?? I'm not sure I would have made it if I hadn't been able to go out on the town with my friends...

[shelly7]

Is this possible?? I'm not sure I would have made it if I hadn't been able to go out on the town with my friends...

 

Good point!

 

 

I retract that statement.

[timlondon]

how can i stop my self from calling him when im out?

 

 

Maybe you should start talking to other guys..? I found that discovering that there were loads of fantastic people out there to meet was an amazing step towards recovery after my breakup.

 

I'm not saying you should go out "on the pull", but just enjoying some male company might do the trick (if you're not already)

[Hope75]

I think it is just a matter of self control. Even when you drink you still know what you are doing- so if you don't want to call him than don't!

 

All drinking does is lower our inhibitions to allow us to do something we wanted to do anyway.

 

Maybe you are not as ready to let him go and be done with it as you would like to think.

[blender]

Well, it's really simple math: "drinking plus dialing equals a disrespectful disregarding of your exes heart, and to your feeling remorseful afterwards".

 

So don't drink, alcohol is a depressent, and really your Karma is getting all screwed up, you are calling a guy who's heart you broke and even though it a little drunken mistake to you, to him, it means something, and he could be attaching all kinds of hope into these calls he's getting.. is that fair? NO, so start by making some better choices in your own behavior...

 

it's simply not classy to get drunk and dial a guy who's heart you broke... (sure we've all done it, BUT, to keep repeating it?) what goes around comes around.. so be careful, start taking some steps to change this behavior, it's not a nice reflection on the quality of your character..

 

besides, you don't "feel good" about it, thank god, so you can do something to change this, and it starts with the fact that at least you came to the site, and can now try to figure out how you will handle not only doing this again in the future, but also the possible damage already done to your exes heart.... what might he be going through right now?

[Siriana]

Think about his feelings. You don't want to give him false hopes, right?

[Batya33]

i do leave my phone with my friend but that doesnt stop me from using someone else's phone to call him lol

i just need to make sure i control my drinking

 

I've lived in NYC for 40 years, had a great time on the most part and never had the need to get drunk or even buzzed - yes, stop drinking and find other ways to have a blast - and other people to have a blast with if you feel pressured to drink with your friends.