kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 got a text at 1030 "thanks for responding today and thanks for causing division in my family you turned my own brother against me after all i did to support your relationships with your family i got set up today and wasted hours to be wrecked wasnt your email enough to hurt me back now you have to come between my family they are all i got i am not with them on this night DONT TELL MY BROTHER they think i am sick i m really just a wreck bc my brother talked down to me today why couldnt you regard my request not to talk to him about me i dont talk to him about you i hope you are happy i am the only one in my family not there with them i am pretty torn apart wish you could help i cant stop crying!" (the only thing i ever said to her bro who was my friend first was that i didnt understand how she could hut me and that it sucked being alone on the holidays) i didnt respond.......her brother calls me and says have you talked to my sister she said she wasnt coming because she was sick and throwing up and he said he felt something was up...i told him i was home laone and didnt hear from her she then calls i didnt answe she left no voicemail 1/2 hour later she texts me again "sorry for bothering you! now you will never know what was in my email like i said i was crying out for a FINAL ATTEMPT FOR YOU TO HEAR ME AND UNDERSTAND ME boy this was a mistake on my part i wanted to make your holiday easier because my brother implied you were not doing that well-this turned out to hurt me for my good intentions lesson leanred one FINAL TIME this was a horrible night but i needed it i guess! sorry for making attempts merry christmas i wish you the best in the next year i will move on now and leave you be take care xxxxxx i am so confused because she was wanting to email me earlier in the day to tell me in a nicer way about how she feels...(well we are over why reiterate it) i didnt respond so now she claims she was trying to make it easier......what the heck i wanted to respond and answer her call so bad but i know she woul have just probably rocked me and leave me hanging why is she doing this ? what should i do ?i miss her so bad and wanted to talk to her but i was so scared Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 I have a gut feeling that you should call her and ask her what she wants from you. If she becomes abusive and won't calm down then you will have to hang-up. But be calm, friendly and do NOT say you want her back unless she says it first. She wants something from you and I think you need to find out what it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 I have a gut feeling that you should call her and ask her what she wants from you. If she becomes abusive and won't calm down then you will have to hang-up. But be calm, friendly and do NOT say you want her back unless she says it first. She wants something from you and I think you need to find out what it is. i think she wants me to hear her sugar coated reasons for breaking up.......if she wanted to reconcile why not say it? right Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BeStrongBeHappy Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 look, these exchanges between you sound so tortured and NOT healthy... are you sure that you really miss her, or are both of you just addicted to the drama this relationship seems to bring? you two keep interacting, and you keep saying you miss her but then you don't respond to her or feel the need to criticize her, and then one or the other of you fires off an accusatory email to the other person blaming them for something and it starts all over again. this is NOT a healthy relationship. you say you miss her and want her, but you can crave heroin, but that doesn't mean its good for you or what you should be doing to yourself. quit punishing each other. either acknowledge you're not good for one another and will continue to hurt each other, or else both of you need to go to counseling and learn to reduce the drama and live a relationship with love and kindness rather than emotional assaults on one another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 what if i text her " if you truly loved me you would make this work for good, if you dont truly love me the leave me completely alone....its that simple" what do you think? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bella321 Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 She is making herself look pathetic. And whatever is in this e-mail that she speaks of is NOT "I want to get back together" because she has no problem attempting communication with you. Your relationship with her is over. You don't need to hear 10 different ways why it is. Do not reply to her messages, do not answer her calls. However, if you think you have the strength, text her back saying, "unless you want to get back together, do not contact me at all. I need my space to move forward". But do not respond to her reply, if she does reply. Let her feel guilty for hurting you. What's done is done. Was she always such an attention-w***e? I'm so sorry that your holiday is filled with this awful nonsense. If I were you, I would seriously change my number. Do it tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 i think she wants me to hear her sugar coated reasons for breaking up.......if she wanted to reconcile why not say it? right Or she may want to reconcile and needs to get whatever it was bothering her acknowledged. Either way you will soon find out and can either go about getting this relationship on a proper footing or know it is really over for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 Or she may want to reconcile and needs to get whatever it was bothering her acknowledged. Either way you will soon find out and can either go about getting this relationship on a proper footing or know it is really over for sure. shouldnt she be more clear.....i hate this i am so afraid to contact her.....i figure if she contacts me again i will tell her "if you love me truly then work it out or levae me alone there is no in between" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DN Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 Yes she should be more clear. But she isn't. So call her and find out what she wants because not knowing eats away at you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 Yes she should be more clear. But she isn't. So call her and find out what she wants because not knowing eats away at you. i am a wuss and i have been here before where i give in and she rocks me and leaves me hangin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
confusedangel Posted December 25, 2006 Share Posted December 25, 2006 i think u guys should talk and try to solve things. either way things won't get solved unless u go to the source. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 25, 2006 Author Share Posted December 25, 2006 i think u guys should talk and try to solve things. either way things won't get solved unless u go to the source. i would talk to herbut she needs to come clean and sit down not write emails or texts thats horse crap Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 26, 2006 Author Share Posted December 26, 2006 i just wish she would get to the point Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kickedin Posted December 26, 2006 Author Share Posted December 26, 2006 i think when she does i will respond but i wont enter a ring of fire when she is takin shots Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
terk2021 Posted December 26, 2006 Share Posted December 26, 2006 kickedin, tough spot. She could just be feeling the blues of the holidays... My ex had a lot of resentment towards me, because a lot of her friends sided with me after she broke up with me. Sounds like she has some internal issues to clear up that have nothing to do with you. Good luck my friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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