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I think I made a BIG mistake :( HELP


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Hey,

 

I'm not even sure what forum I should write this in...it seems to fit everywhere.

 

My bf and I broke up about 1 month ago (we dated for 5 years). Although I ended the relationship, I felt as if he really dumped me. I felt he wasn't completely honest with me, didn't respect my feelings and had lost his empathy/love for me.

 

I was going 3 weeks NC until I got into a terrible car accident and then contacted my ex from the hospital. I got weak, I felt alone...I realize it was a stupid thing to do to call him.

 

We talked for about 1 week after the accident and then met up in person a few days ago. I regret it

 

I shouldn't have contacted him...shouldn't have seen him...shouldn't have gotten close with him again. (we got way too close and I shouldn't have)

 

Now I am panicking and don't know what to do. i feel so lost. worse than before NC. i really hate myself

 

I asked him if he hooked up with anyone else during our 3 weeks of NC and he said no but I am so paranoid/worry that he did and don't know what to do

 

please help.

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Don't be so hard on yourself. You were hurting from your car accident and you reached out to the man that loved you for 5 years and probably still loves you. It's ok.

Now that you are feeling better , you can think about what kind of , if any relationship you have with the ex. It's ok to still care about him.

Just take it easy and if you feel like calling him, ask yourself if you really want to do it.

Do some thinking on your own about how you feel about him. Give yourself some time and space to see what your feelings are.

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i was in a similar situation a while ago, so i know how you feel..but please don't be so hard on yourself.... you were shaken up by the accident so it was natural for you to reach out to him.... but look at it like this- you made a mistake but now rather than regretting it (which helps nothing) you can learn from it, because it probably made you think about what you do/don't want from your ex.

 

be honest with yourself, give yourself space from him to make the right decisions for YOU. just keep the NC going unless you really have something to say to him, and say it sooner than later so you can resume NC as soon as possible on your OWN terms and feel good about it. good luck and stay strong!

 

p.s. don't worry about what he's doing right now, just focus on yourself right now and leave him be... you'll feel better sooner that way

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it was a bad idea b/c my ex is not good for me...he has done a lot to hurt me in our relationship and has never been able to apologize/change. he blames me for everything yet is unwilling to take any responsibility. i felt as if he has really taken advantage of me during the relationship and has been dishonest with me.

 

my crisis led me to him again. i shouldn't have done that. i met up with him and we became intimate. i really regret it so much right now. i am punishing myself now.

 

i don't understand why i ran to someone that i do not trust during my time of crisis.

 

now i not only have to deal with my crisis and the aftermath but also deal with this extra baggage in my heart.

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