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I remember a time when I had a circle of friends. This was of course back in high school. We all hung out together, talked all the time, and did things together all the time. And slowly one by one, I lost all my friends. Some got married, some moved, some went into the armed forces. And still some I had a falling out with as I got to know them for the rotten turncoats that they really were. Just this last year, I lost my last friend to a woman. It was his first relationship, and he was very excited. I wished him well and off he went with her. Unfortunately he never came back. So after a few months of being ignored I moved out and vowed it was over. I can truly say I lost most of my friends to “significant others”.


Some of my ‘friends’ still try to stay in contact with me, and still want to talk and hang out with me, yet somehow its not the same. I’m sure most people would be happy to have friends like these, and yet somehow I don’t think so. Honestly, I felt betrayed. How could some woman take my place? And better yet, how could my so called best friends just forget about me completely, then try to come back a month later and be my buddy?


It is refreshing nowadays; I can say I have no true friends. A coworker of mine is my only friend, although I wouldn’t qualify us as close friends. She is in a serious relationship herself, but we talk a lot about different things. It is nice to talk to her, as I have no one else to talk to, and I sure as heck am not going to talk about my feeling with my mom!!


But today I think that the idea of friends is different. I used to think of friends as those who hung out together, and could talk about anything, and were there for each other. But nowadays it’s not like that. To be honest, I think people only care so much, and then they don’t care. I often times am a loner, and enjoy it to some degree, but I still miss the connection of friends. Often times I have plenty of spare time, and no one to hang out with. The concept of friends has definitely changed.



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That was a very insightful post.


I agree with you that as people get older and out of high school, the dynamics of our friendships change and also our ideas of friendship. People eventually develop other interests, go their own way and make what amounts to be, their own life. I only stay in touch with 2 or 3 friends from high school, but our friendships have definitely changed over the years. There was even a period of a few years when we didn't talk at all. I can't explain why really though. But these things happen. New people come in and out of our lives, some of them we can consider friends and some not.


You raised a good point about people caring only up to a certain point. I think some younger kids (in high school) can be better friends to each other in a sense that generally speaking, they're willing to do more for their friends.


Good post.

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A lot of my friends have drifted off as well, into serious relationships or moved away. But that doesn't mean that you can't still meet up with them sometimes for dinner or to go out etc. I think this is just something that happens as people get older. They get caught up in their own lives!

You should figure out what kind of things you like and what makes you happy and do them! Like go to the gym, take up a new class or hobby...you can meet people that way, and the better you feel about yourself the more likely you are to attract people! Friends and people you may want to date.

You sound like you're going through a rough time right now. Hang in there and surround yourself with family and friends that are still around!

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