First time sex....? Scary.

[finch_jr]

Hi, my name is Graham, im 15 from bedford in england.

 

I've been in a relationship for about 8months with my girlfriend, shes 15 too. she keeps talking about sex and we always do that dirty talk, and we've done all the other stuff you do like foreplay and i like that a lot so its like im hinting that i want to have sex but im actually very aprehensive about it.

 

There are a lot of people my age who have had sex, especially amongst our group of friends. So there seems no reason for why we should not have sex but the thought of getting her pregnant scares me to death. I know that condoms are quite safe but ill still be worried because they are not 100%

 

I was just wondering if anyone could give me some advice on how to go about having first time sex with a very small risk of getting my girlfriend pregnant. Thankyou.

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey. I'm assuming you know what to do and stuff so we'll move on 2 ur question.

 

There's never a 100% guarantee that she won't get pregnant unless someone's sterile or been sterilised. I'm sure u kno all about sex, 15, i think they talk about it at skool. Wear a condom, 2 if u want 2 b really safe, make her use contraceptive pills and try not 2 use the withdrawal method, it's more suitable for slightly more expereinced ppl.

 

Happy Heb

[Gunther]

hi finch, first let me start by saying not many ppl have sex at 15 {no matter what your friends tell you or anybody else} there is a lot of guy talk that goes on between friends, a lot of it is also just not true, men and women will try to brag about how they have already done it before. if you are wondering my advice, my advice is dont do it! the odds of getting her pregnant are to great to risk, I know that there might be a lot of peer presure but you cant give into that, that is the way a lot of ppl try to get you to do things that you KNOW are wrong, {know let me just clarify, I am not saying that you don't love eachother, dont get that mixed up} I'll give you a tip about people, most people on subjects that are this delicate a lot of people are unsure of themselfs and will back off very easily so if you just keep pretending in a playfull manner that you think they are just joking they will usualy back down. This however assumes that you still want to have sex despite the odds, but I wont get into that as I don't think that ppl that young should be having sex, I am sorry but all I can say is that unless you get some kind of surgery, children will ALWAYS be in the cards no matter how many condoms you wear, there is always a chance of getting her pregnant, and if you did get her pregnant the only thing you can do {leagaly anyways} is get yourself a job and start taking care of it when it is born. {please take this post in the way it was intended to aid you in your desision not to discourage you}

[KarenWalker]

Ahh okay here's my piece of advice:

 

don't use 2 condoms!! It's a myth that it's safer, actually wearing 2 increases your chances of them breaking...you see, laytex on laytex causes the condoms to tear much more easily...

 

and never use withdrawl no matter how experienced you are!

 

and remember don't have sex because everyone else is, only do it for you. i don't think there's a right age, so it's not that you're too young to have sex...it just worries me that you are having so many doubts. but do what you want and do it safe

 

hope i helped.

karenwalker.

[KarenWalker]

Ahh okay here's my piece of advice:

 

don't use 2 condoms!! It's a myth that it's safer, actually wearing 2 increases your chances of them breaking...you see, laytex on laytex causes the condoms to tear much more easily...

 

and never use withdrawl no matter how experienced you are!

 

and remember don't have sex because everyone else is, only do it for you. i don't think there's a right age, so it's not that you're too young to have sex...it just worries me that you are having so many doubts. but do what you want and do it safe

 

hope i helped.

karenwalker.

[sparker]

Dude,

I have been with other people besides my wife. Do you plan on getting married? If you do, my advise is wait. You are not too young for sex, but sex is something very very special between two people. If you have sex it WILL affect your relationships in the future. Now you may be saying I am going to marry this woman, but truth is you can't be sure of that till you do. My advice is don't have sex just to have sex. Have sex with the woman you love and marry. Just my advise, take it or leave it, but I can tell you from experience the problems it will cause for the person you finally marry are not worth the experience now. Trust me. I have been where you are.

Also, I have two friends who had sex at a young age. They both got there gf pregnant and the used protection, condoms. The both work minimum wage jobs, one is married, one is not. One pays child support and will for 16 more years. The other is very unhappy with his life becasue his child has taken his youth away from him. When all his buddies are going out having a good time, he is working to put food on the table. He loved fast cars, but he drives a Tercel because he can't afford anything else. I also have another friend. He was smart, he waited till he was much older and has had sex with only the woman he is married too. He has a good job, makes good money and drives a really nice car. He has a great wife who respects him in this area because he felt that sex was special enough that he kept it for just her. He has a great life. He deserves it, he did it the right way.

Best of luck man.

[finch_jr]

Ok, thanks guys. I appreciate it a lot. I must say my main concern was getting her pregnant. i do love her and hope to marry her some day but i guess lots of people say this at 15.

 

I am still concerned because she wants it so much. Im very apprehensive so im goner say no until im ready. Also ive realised that if we had sex and the condom split then we went to get the morning after pill, i would probably be arrested !!!! so its a no until were both 16 at least. She'll probably leave me before then because she wants sex but then if she does that she doesnt love me for what i am and doesnt respect my decision, so forget that. On second thought, i dont think she will leave me. Which is reasurring because the thoght of that is stomach churningly awful.

 

Thanks again. You guys really helped out

[JGsGirl]

Hi-

 

I know I am a little late with this, but I felt like writing to you.... I lost my virginity at 15, not because I really wanted to, but because I felt well HE wants too why not. BIG mistake. I regret it to this day and I am 25!!! I wish I would have waited. You can't make that important of a decision because everyone else is "doing it"! It's a decision that you have to make for yourself and no one else..... If you really love this girl and she loves you than it won't hurt to wait. If she can't wait than she doesn't care for you as much as you think or she tells you she does.....

 

Good luck and if you do decide BE CAREFUL.... remember the only fool proof way from staying away from pregnancy and STD's is not having sex at all.

[Starlette]

Hello there, I am Starlette Took and I'm here to help you out...

 

I agree with some things said here... But I think you should follow the Ten Commandment on this one... Don't have sex until married, there's always a percent and it's just not right at 15. Think about it... Maybe you two will have a blast and whatnot... But... There is always a possibility. What if she does end up pregnant? Both your lives will be shattered... I'm turning 15 this week and I'm going through the same temptation with my boyfriend... e haven't done foreplay... Just hickies and intense making out. We love each other, and he's told me he wants to have intercourse but we bot know it's not right for now.

 

Be rational... I don't think your little peers really are active sexually.. And if they are, they're hella lucky that pregnancy didn't come into the situation. Just imagine a friend being a young parent... Gone from school.. A job.. Forced to marry their beloved... Responsibilities... Man, isn't all that too much to handle already? Live your life right.. Take it slow, take it easy. You'll have so much time for sex later that you'll even get sick of it. Believe me, we all do get tired of it in the end.

 

Be smart, don't make a big mistake you'll end up regretting for the rest of your life. If you become a young father you'll spend the rest of your life wondering what life would have been like if you hadn't gone and gotten her married. This is just one girlfriend.. They'll come and they'll go... You're not old enough to engage in a proper {serious} relationship.. Only fifteen...

 

I'm asking you to be rational now. What will you do?