as usual, i'm confused

[gradle]

i'm frustrated b/c i'm dating this really awesome guy right now. we are very similar and hit it off really well. but he's so busy at work he can't be as attentive as i'd like him to be. and sometimes it's like, i'm not sure if he's really into me, b/c i don't hear from him for a couple of days. i know this is a part of dating, and it's partially my fault b/c i dated him this summer and he was sort of the same way, so busy at work that i sort of drifted and met someone else ©. but out of the blue he called and we've been dating again,

 

well, C and i didn't work out, adn it's fine, i didn't think it would from the beginning, but after we were over he went back to sleeping with his ex when he goes back home. and i started dating peple again. but i am still really attracted to him, but i know we can't be more than just friends. but i still get jealous, which sucks b/c C and i have become really good friends. but i know his ex still sends pics of herself to him and stuff like that. but i guess part of me is just jealous b/c C was always really attentive. but in the end, he's just not the right guy for me.

why do i still get jealous and so mad at him sometimes when i talk to him? part of me thinks it's b/c he went out of his way to break me and the first guy up, and when i finally fell for him, he just got scared and ran, but if he's back with his ex, was he really scared of beign serious with me? that just kind of hurts i guess

 

and now, this other guy, who is really such a good person. i can't stand the thought of being hurt by him. and i'm scared i'm being silly. i have to let myself risk it. but i'm nervous, b/c i already feel hurt when he says he'll call, and it takes him longer than usual. urgh. C was like infatuated with me at first and couldn't stay away, and this guy is ok with out me, but seems to like having me in his life, but it seems like it would be ok if i weren't in there. i'm so scared to be hurt.

please help.

[annie24]

((((HUGS)))) did you see the happy birthday message I left you? Happy birthday!!!!!

 

Anyways, about your guy? ug. I don't know. I hear you!

[gradle]

awww! thanks annie you're the sweetest!!!

 

i don't know. men are dumb

[gradle]

i guess i'm just a little ashamed. i was kind of mean to C when i talked to him tonight. and i shoudln't have been. he hurt my feelings, i'd hurt his...but in the end i ended up feeling more hurt. and he really is one fo my closest friends. i just took out my frustration on him.

and i apologized. but i just still feel bad.

[annie24]

I wouldn't freak out. I would use the time when you don't hear from him to think if he is really the right guy for you and do other stuff. Did you ever pick up mars and venus on a date? it is a good book. time apart from each other is good.

 

how is life otherwise?

[gradle]

me?!? how are YOU?! i'm sorry i disappear. it's just i think so much when i come on this site.

 

life is good. hoping to go to grad school, waiting to hear from them.... friends are great and plentiful, i'm a lucky girl in so many ways

trying to stay in more and not go to the bars so much. just get stuff done, you know?

 

i miss j a ton. but i'm learning that i'll always love him, or at least who he was when i fell in love with him, adn realizing that that's not the same J that exists now. and that those are feelings that i can live with and hopefully use some of that love for someone more deserving...

 

job is going well, so i'm happy with that. i just think too much when it comes to the men. which is probably why i can't sit still wiht any of them.

but i have high hopes for this guy. and i'm not down on him b/c he's busy. i like to know that he has a life and is busy for good reasons, like work and his sisters and his friends. C is dating his ex mainly b/c she accepts him regardless of how he treats her (cheats on her, dumps her, etc, she's very devoted i guess) and i know i couldn't be like that with anyone.

and i'm lucky b/c i know that i'll be fine with or without thsi guy, it's just i have this flaw in that i'm just a very impatient person. i like to know things NOW. blah!!

i have to work on that .

[Lily04]

hey,

 

i feel like i can relate to you soo much!! wow. i'm sorta having a similar problem.......but why do you even want to be with this guy if he cheated and dumped his ex. like that? I'm not sure he sounds like the best guy to be with....esp. if he doesn't call you back....but i feel the same because i don't want to be with this guy for moral reasons, but at the same time i'm completely into him. i love his personality.

 

i'm not sure what to do. i ignored him, blocked him, and now he thinks i'm completely not into him but i still can't get my mind off of him. it's comparable to if someone like brad pitt i suppose asked you out, and you don't want to because you suspect he's a player, has lots of girls, etc....but of course you're still attracted to him. that's sorta the same way for me, except it's not so much physical attraction (although that is evidently there) but more just a spark between us.

 

it's driving me crazy!!!!!!!!!